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But we'd never really seen eye to eye. Mostly 'cause he was much taller than I was.

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Eye
Much
Really
Never
Taller
Mostly
Cause
Seen
Causes

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Then I asked her if she wanted to to the funeral, and my God, the look on her face. You'd think I'd asked her to drown the neighbor's cat. Admittedly, drowning the neighbor's cat didn't really clue me in as much as I would've liked. So, she was angry? He blinked back to me and stared. Like a long time.
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He had threatened my parents. I had to remember that. Still, it was really hard to stay mad at a wounded naked man.
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He was like chocolate-covered heroin, and I was an addict through and through.
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In Cookie's defense, it was raining wildcats and rabid dogs.
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I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
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If it weren’t for physics and law enforcement, I’d be unstoppable.
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I climbed into Misery and called Uncle Bob. “We hooking up?” “Why does everything out of your mouth make me sound incestuous?” “Um, I wasn’t aware that it did. Perhaps you have a guilty conscience.” “Charley.” “Is there something you need to get off your chest? Besides that skank I saw you with the other day?
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I could hardly be responsible for my actions when everyone around me gave me every opportunity to sink to their low expectations.
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I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker
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It isn’t the fall that will kill you, but the sudden stop.
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I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.
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She shook her head then took off again, and I found myself struggling to keep up with her in my bunny slippers. With a sigh, I realized I was getting way too much exercise. I'd just have to counteract it later with cake.
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I sort of got off on making bad guys sweat. Which was not unlike my love of making good guys sweat, just by very different means.
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Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.
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Come here often?' I asked instead, humoring no one but myself. So it was totally worth it.
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Reyes leaned back against the bar, crossed his arms over his chest, and studied me from beneath those same ridiculously long lashes. Men and their freaking lashes. It was so unfair. Like the exorbitant cost of designer shoes. Or world hunger.
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But have you ever seen one?....They shook their heads. Not Physically, no. But if you look at this passage - Man, she liked that Bible. I'd read it and could definitely understand it's appeal, but I didn't have time for this.
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Cookie had taken her daughter amber to school then walked the thirty-something feet to work earlier. Our business was on the second floor of Calamity's, my dad's bar, which sat right in front of our apartment building. The short commute was nice and rarely invloved rabid raccoons.
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Want coffee? I asked, as I headed that way. It's three thirty in the morning. Okay. Want coffee?
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I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.
Darynda Jones