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I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
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More quotes by Darynda Jones
Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have been nice.
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Oh, and she told me that men want only one thing. And on that note, I must give praise and thanks to the powers that be. I don't want much else from them either.
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A sheriff arrested me. I could be mistaken, but I'm pretty sure my men-in-uniform fetish began that day. The sheriff was hot. And he handcuffed me. I've never been the same.
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I could hardly be responsible for my actions when everyone around me gave me every opportunity to sink to their low expectations.
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There comes a moment when you know you just aren't going to do anything esle productive for the rest of the day.-T-Shirt
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It isn’t the fall that will kill you, but the sudden stop.
Darynda Jones
“Time-out,” I said... He twisted his hand around and wound his fingers into mine. “You‘re putting me in time-out?” “Yes,” I said as a shaky sigh slid through my lips. “If I don't go, do I get a spanking?”
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Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
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I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
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Hello? I said, because Charley's House of Pasties seemed wrong.
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See you in a few. Hold down the fort, Mr. Wong!
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Rocket, I said, straightening in the chair. Donovan was just helping me with my contacts. Donovan raised his brows humorously. Rocket furrowed his. Did you swallow them?
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I’m Charlotte Davidson: private investigator, police consultant, all -around badass. Or I could’ve been a badass, had I stuck with those lessons in mixed martial arts. I was only in that class to learn how to kill people with paper.
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Have they even seen the Winchester boys? Sammy and Dean's existence proves there is a god and she is a woman.
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Whatever makes your balloon red, Swopes.
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Death comes to those who wait. And to those who don't. So either way.
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Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.
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I chose the road less traveled. Now I'm lost.
Darynda Jones
Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. Do you still like me? I never liked you. Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley
Darynda Jones
There is a great need for a sarcasm font.
Darynda Jones