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When fighting clowns, always go for the juggler.
Darynda Jones
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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
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Friona
Texas
Clowns
Clown
Fighting
Always
Juggler
Jugglers
More quotes by Darynda Jones
I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
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I had yet to be a mother, but I would have thought it difficult to forget something it took thirty-seven hours of excruciating pain to push out from between my legs ~Charley Davidson
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Rocket, I said, straightening in the chair. Donovan was just helping me with my contacts. Donovan raised his brows humorously. Rocket furrowed his. Did you swallow them?
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What's your specialty? Oh, you know. Madness. Mayhem. Debauchery. And even with all that going for me, I can still make a mean mojito.
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A Nuns Life: Chastity, poverty, and obedience. Wait, chastity? BUMPER STICKER
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Give it up? Not likely. Besides, what else would I do? I totally should have gone to Hogwart's when I had the chance.
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Reyes Farrow. Because perfection is a dirty job, but someone has to do it.
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I know, he said in almost bored contemplation. My manners suck. I like to chalk it up to a dissatisfying childhood. I'd chalk it up to that narcissistic personality disorder laces with a smidgen of schizophrenia. Your mother would be proud.
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I knew dating the son of Satan would turn out badly
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After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
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Surely my macking on some guy in an insane asylum wouldn't hurt him. He'd been living with his stalker, for heaven's sake.
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Reyes leaned back against the bar, crossed his arms over his chest, and studied me from beneath those same ridiculously long lashes. Men and their freaking lashes. It was so unfair. Like the exorbitant cost of designer shoes. Or world hunger.
Darynda Jones
The police never find it as funny as you do.-T-Shirt
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What do I look like, the ghost whisperer? They're loony. I'd have better luck talking to my cousin Alfonso's Chihuahua. At least Tía Juana knows Spanish. Your cousin's Chihuahua is named Tía Juana?
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I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
Darynda Jones
He had threatened my parents. I had to remember that. Still, it was really hard to stay mad at a wounded naked man.
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What did one say to a stalker? Um, pardon me, Mr.Stalker, but could you, like, not?
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Man, I want to be someone's forbidden fruit. Well, you are pretty fruity.
Darynda Jones
Pretending to drink coffee was similar to faking an orgasm.
Darynda Jones
Before I tell you, I have to know three things, I said. Okay. One, are you sitting down? Yes. Two, are you mentally stable? More than you'll ever be. Well, that was uncalled for. And three, how do you spell schizophrenia? What does that have to do with anything? Nothing. I just wanted to see if you'd tell me.
Darynda Jones