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When fighting clowns, always go for the juggler.

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Juggler
Jugglers
Clowns
Clown
Fighting
Always

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You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT
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Apparently, this really was Kill Charley Davidson Week. Or at least Horribly Maim Her.... It would probably never get government recognition, though, destined to be underappreciated like Halloween or Thesaurus Day.
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I could hardly be responsible for my actions when everyone around me gave me every opportunity to sink to their low expectations.
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I like to see the glass as half full, hopefully of jack daniels.
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There was nothing like a trip to the gynecologist to make one feel just a little violated. Charley
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Honestly, he acted as though he didn't like me anymore. Wait, maybe he didn't. Do you still like me? I never liked you. Oh, right. He had a point. Garreth & Charley
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There is nothing to fear but fear itself. And spiders. ~Bumper sticker~
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I totally should've gone to Hogwarts when I had the chance.
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That boy needs a hobby. Stalking is a hobby. So is serial killing.
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We stood there, the three of us, our jaws firmly planted on the floor. Aunt Lil recovered first. She nudged me with her elbow and said with a cackle of delight, I think you guys should make some more of those brownies, 'cause that boy looks hungry.
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I meant to behave. There were just too many other options.--T-SHIRT
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She still wasn't convinced. So, if you were a guy, would you be into me? Hon, if I were a guy, I'd be gay. Yeah, me, too.
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Does Uncle Bob have anything? I heard he has an STD. I mean on the women. Oh, I have no idea if they have any STDs.
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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
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He was like chocolate-covered heroin, and I was an addict through and through.
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I may not have any skeletons in my closet, but I do have a little box of souls in my sock drawer. —T-SHIRT
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I'm a virgin. But this is an old shirt. --T-SHIRT
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When life hands you lemons say, Lemons? What else have you got? - bumper sticker
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I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.
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I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker
Darynda Jones