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God I loved Sammy. I’d considered marrying him, but his wife got upset when I asked for his hand.

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Marrying
Upset
Considered
Asked
Loved
Wife
Hand
Hands
Sammy

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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
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You can't fix stupid, but you can numb it was a 2 by 4.--T-SHIRT
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He had given me so much information, I wanted some time to absorb it all, but I didn't want to leave him. Not like this. Not ever, as long as I lived. Or until I had to get back on the case. Whichever came first.
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I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.
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I know how you feel. I’ve been analyzed to death as well. Not, like, professionally, though I did date a psych major who said I had attention issues. Or at least that’s what I think he said. I wasn’t really paying attention. Anyway, where was I?
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If I was going to go out tonight, I was going to go out fighting. Or screaming in agony. Either way.
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You’re the reason I breathe
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Man, I want to be someone's forbidden fruit. Well, you are pretty fruity.
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When fighting clowns, always go for the juggler.
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I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - T-SHIRT
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guys have feelings too. But like...who cares? -Inspirational poster
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Come here often?' I asked instead, humoring no one but myself. So it was totally worth it.
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You were the one who hit me on the roof? I hit you on the jaw. We just happened to be on a roof at the time.
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Nobody wants to look like a fool. Nine times out of ten, that reason alone keeps people from allowing themselves to believe.
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After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
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Felt my heartbeat falter, hesitate, then stumble awkwardly forward, tripping on the next beat, then the next, faster and faster until each one tumbled into the other like the drumroll of dominoes crashing together. Funny how time stands still when death is imminent.
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I often question my sanity. Occasionally, it replies.
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I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker
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Give it up? Not likely. Besides, what else would I do? I totally should have gone to Hogwart's when I had the chance.
Darynda Jones
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What do I look like, the ghost whisperer? They're loony. I'd have better luck talking to my cousin Alfonso's Chihuahua. At least Tía Juana knows Spanish. Your cousin's Chihuahua is named Tía Juana?
Darynda Jones