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Ask me about my complete lack of interest. (T-shirt)

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Shirt
Shirts
Lack
Complete
Asks
Interest

More quotes by Darynda Jones

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I may not have any skeletons in my closet, but I do have a little box of souls in my sock drawer. —T-SHIRT
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Man, that woman was quick when she wanted to be. But put her behind the wheel of a Buick.
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I may as well cut my losses and make a hasty exit while I still had enough self-esteem to walk upright. Crawling was so demoralizing
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But we'd never really seen eye to eye. Mostly 'cause he was much taller than I was.
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I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. - T-SHIRT
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She still wasn't convinced. So, if you were a guy, would you be into me? Hon, if I were a guy, I'd be gay. Yeah, me, too.
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There was nothing like a trip to the gynecologist to make one feel just a little violated. Charley
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I'd never taken to four foot creatures who had the uncanny ability to point out all my flaws in thirty second flat. And just for the record, I can too read without moving my lips.
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I went down like a drunken cowgirl trying to line dance to Metallica.
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I could hardly be responsible for my actions when everyone around me gave me every opportunity to sink to their low expectations.
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What did one say to a stalker? Um, pardon me, Mr.Stalker, but could you, like, not?
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I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.
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She didn't smile back. Not even a little. I totally needed to read that book on how to win friends and influence people. But that would involve an innate desire to win friends and influence people.
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Reyes leaned back against the bar, crossed his arms over his chest, and studied me from beneath those same ridiculously long lashes. Men and their freaking lashes. It was so unfair. Like the exorbitant cost of designer shoes. Or world hunger.
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You’re the reason I breathe
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A Nuns Life: Chastity, poverty, and obedience. Wait, chastity? BUMPER STICKER
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That you honestly believe I am capable of hurting innocent people for no reason.” “You’re not?” I asked, hope softening my voice. “Oh, no, I’m more than capable. I just didn’t realize you knew that.
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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
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What's your specialty? Oh, you know. Madness. Mayhem. Debauchery. And even with all that going for me, I can still make a mean mojito.
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He had given me so much information, I wanted some time to absorb it all, but I didn't want to leave him. Not like this. Not ever, as long as I lived. Or until I had to get back on the case. Whichever came first.
Darynda Jones