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I pointed in the general vicinity of my left ovary, This is Beam Me Up. Then to my right. And this is Scotty. Garret chuckled and buried his face in his hands. He asked.

Darynda Jones

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Darynda Jones
Age: 59
Author
Novelist
Writer
Friona
Texas
Right
Pointed
Buried
General
Garret
Asked
Ovaries
Face
Chuckled
Faces
Scotty
Left
Vicinity
Hands
Beam

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.. an emergency stash of Thin Mints. Frickin' Girl Scouts. Those things were way to addictive. They had to be laced with crack. Charlie Davidson Fourth Grave Beneath my Feet
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I climbed into Misery and called Uncle Bob. “We hooking up?” “Why does everything out of your mouth make me sound incestuous?” “Um, I wasn’t aware that it did. Perhaps you have a guilty conscience.” “Charley.” “Is there something you need to get off your chest? Besides that skank I saw you with the other day?
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The funny thing about GPS was it didn’t always send you in the right direction. I knew that if I took a right and took Twelfth instead, I’d get there faster, so I turned right. Ozzy did not approve. “Wut the foock?
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After a long, labored sigh, I said, “She was really happy when I got there. I’m pretty sure she was suicidal when I left.” “You do have that effect on people.
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I did that thing where you scratch your eyebrow and flip someone off at the same time. I'm good at multitasking like that.
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After a geological epoch passed in which single-celled organisms evolved into talk show hosts, Mr. Coffee was still holding out on me.
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I chose the road less traveled. Now I'm lost.
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I was just passing by. Saw the commotion. Figured you were involved.
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It’s all fun and games until someone loses a testicle. —T-SHIRT
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Still, this whole grim reaper thing should have come with a manual. Or a diagram of some kind. A flowchart would have been nice.
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Who is Dr. A. von Holstein? And is he related, by chance, to a race of cows?
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I noticed you tore down Donovan's house. He lifted his gaze until it locked with mine. He's alive because he left town. His house chose to stay. It paid the price.
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If I was going to go out tonight, I was going to go out fighting. Or screaming in agony. Either way.
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I was white. Chalk had more color than I did. And quite possibly more personality.
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You can’t have him, okay,” she said from behind the wire barrier. “Mm-hmm,” I whispered. “This is certainly a beautiful neighborhood.” “Yeah, I guess.” “I will scratch those eyes out of your ugly head.
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I love children, but I don't think I can eat a whole one.- Bumper sticker
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When I want your opinion, I'll remove the duct tape.--T-SHIRT
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There comes a moment when you know you just aren't going to do anything esle productive for the rest of the day.-T-Shirt
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