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Now it's time for amasians... That's Asians doing something amazing.

Daniel Tosh

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Daniel Tosh
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: May 29
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Executive Producer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Boppard am Rhein
Daniel Dwight Tosh
Asians
Amazing
Something
Time

More quotes by Daniel Tosh

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Thank you ... San Francisco. All right, you're ruining the show. Thank you ... for clapping for what my parents are ashamed of.
Daniel Tosh
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I don't want to develop a personality, just cut my face! Stretch it and staple it. Now I'm happy, or at least I look like it.
Daniel Tosh
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I like my women like I like my coffee . . . I don’t like coffee.
Daniel Tosh
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I'm aware that I should end a joke with the good part, I choose not too.
Daniel Tosh
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If you look at the Bible and you look at Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden, we all know who sinned first. Ladies, do you have to eat everything?
Daniel Tosh
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Spelling is difficult because there are too many rules. Silent letters only exist to make it harder for illegal immigrants to learn English.
Daniel Tosh
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I don't know what's more embarrassing in this country, that Michael Phelps fell from the graces for smoking marijuana or that you looked up to a swimmer in the first place?
Daniel Tosh
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The only advice I have for youth is to date outside your race. I just think it's so cute when I see little kids in interracial relationships it makes me feel like I'm watching a commercial.
Daniel Tosh
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Recently started flat ironing my ball hair. Come on ladies, you know how it is if you have curly hair you just want straight hair.
Daniel Tosh
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I'm sick of the media making female sports athletes into supermodels, when they're clearly sixes at best.
Daniel Tosh
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I actually got a part in 'The Love Guru', that Mike Myers film. I heard it's awful. I got a Razzie award for it, which I'm quite proud of, but I still haven't seen it. I have no plans to branch out.
Daniel Tosh
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Instead of dumping all my money on an independent film that nobody would watch and most people would make fun of behind my back, I decided, 'I'm just going to buy a house.'
Daniel Tosh
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Slutiness is a very underrated quality in a girl.
Daniel Tosh
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I'm not a good actor, I can play myself and a much gayer version of myself. That's my range.
Daniel Tosh
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Here's a shock: An adult who still hangs out in skate parks is a bad parent.
Daniel Tosh
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The national anthem blows. Are you kidding me? Do any of you have it on your iPod?
Daniel Tosh
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I'm a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect!
Daniel Tosh
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There's only two types of men left in this world. Lumberjacks and Liam Nesson.
Daniel Tosh
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You know what really shuts up a bully? Learning how to build a pipe-bomb!
Daniel Tosh
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God does not hate gay people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.
Daniel Tosh