Quote

I do think we can be a little less PC when it comes to sports, though. Just once I want to hear an announcer go 'God, black people are fast. Holy cow! All of them. They're fast. Back to you Bob.'

Daniel Tosh

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Daniel Tosh
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: May 29
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Executive Producer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Boppard am Rhein
Daniel Dwight Tosh
Black
Bob
Comes
Cows
Littles
Fast
Back
Holy
Little
Hear
Think
Sports
Thinking
Though
Announcer
People
Less
Announcers

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My excuse for everything is that I grew up in Florida.
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People write a lot of similar material. That's why I try to come up with the most absurd jokes.
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I'm not a good actor, I can play myself and a much gayer version of myself. That's my range.
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A gynecologist is the dentist for the downstairs mouth.
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You are a sick freak who should be beaten.
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Fifty Shades Of Grey proved you can write about a dude choking women and shoving stuff up their butts but heaven forbid if you tell a legitimate joke about it. Sure I doubled the number of feminists who hate me, but I also doubled the number of shows I have on TV. No regrets.
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The only advice I have for youth is to date outside your race. I just think it's so cute when I see little kids in interracial relationships it makes me feel like I'm watching a commercial.
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I came up with my own expression. I like to make it hail. Yeah. That's when you throw change on sluts.
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Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it.
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Instead of dumping all my money on an independent film that nobody would watch and most people would make fun of behind my back, I decided, 'I'm just going to buy a house.'
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Germany's like Wisconsin, but with, like, a really bad past.
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Never hit a woman unless you are a bigger woman.
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God does not hate gay people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.
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Slutiness is a very underrated quality in a girl.
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I'll tell you what's better than watching the sunrise... Sleeping through it.
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Recently started flat ironing my ball hair. Come on ladies, you know how it is if you have curly hair you just want straight hair.
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Sometimes my mind wanders other times it leaves completely.
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I like my women like I like my coffee . . . I don’t like coffee.
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