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Slutiness is a very underrated quality in a girl.

Daniel Tosh

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Daniel Tosh
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: May 29
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Executive Producer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Boppard am Rhein
Daniel Dwight Tosh
Underrated
Quality
Girl

More quotes by Daniel Tosh

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If security guards aren't allowed to carry guns, I don't have to obey their made up rules.
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You know, you can only cram your beliefs down a young kid's throat for so long before he goes, you know, the other side seems to be having a lot more fun.
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Big, skinny, regular size it doesn't matter as long as your young.
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If no meant no then every man would die a virgin.
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If you offer me a starring role in a movie, I have no interest.
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Yes, I am aware that I am the gayer version of Jeff Lewis.
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It's not that hard to climb a pole. All you need are powerful thighs and an empty soul.
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My excuse for everything is that I grew up in Florida.
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I'm also not good with numbers either, so it's not a great mix. People apparently don't want you ball-parkin' it when it comes to their finances.
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You know what really shuts up a bully? Learning how to build a pipe-bomb!
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Ben Roethlisberger is Tim Tebow minus Jesus.
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I don't know what's more embarrassing in this country, that Michael Phelps fell from the graces for smoking marijuana or that you looked up to a swimmer in the first place?
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I have voices in my head, but they're all speaking Spanish, and I have NO idea what they're saying.
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Decorating the gym can't mask the fact that it smells like a mix between corsage and balls.
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Sometimes my mind wanders other times it leaves completely.
Daniel Tosh
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I grew up in Florida and went to school there, and ended up going to University of Central Florida.
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The only reason Woodstock was necessary is because they didn't have iTunes.
Daniel Tosh
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I love people of all ethnicities, as long as they're not ugly.
Daniel Tosh
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Fifty Shades Of Grey proved you can write about a dude choking women and shoving stuff up their butts but heaven forbid if you tell a legitimate joke about it. Sure I doubled the number of feminists who hate me, but I also doubled the number of shows I have on TV. No regrets.
Daniel Tosh
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Have you heard about the morning after pill, or what I like to call breakfast in bed. Well have you heard about how some of the girls who have taken have died a few days later? Talk about two birds, looks like I will be going to the game this weekend boys.
Daniel Tosh