Quote

I'm not honest, but you're interesting!

Daniel Tosh

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Daniel Tosh
Age: 49
Born: 1975
Born: May 29
Actor
Comedian
Dancer
Executive Producer
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Boppard am Rhein
Daniel Dwight Tosh
Interesting
Honest

More quotes by Daniel Tosh

Image
I came up with my own expression. I like to make it hail. Yeah. That's when you throw change on sluts.
Daniel Tosh
Image
God does not hate gay people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.
Daniel Tosh
Image
That Asian guy is really good at kicking. Shocking. Someone is pressing 'A' really fast somewhere.
Daniel Tosh
Image
I grew up in Florida and went to school there, and ended up going to University of Central Florida.
Daniel Tosh
Image
I don't know what popping-and-locking is but I know to lock my car door whenever people are doing it.
Daniel Tosh
Image
I hate the idea of owning a gun, but I love the idea of owning a cannon.
Daniel Tosh
Image
Canadians complain too much. 'I like seasons.' So do I that's why I live in a place that skips the [unpleasant] ones.
Daniel Tosh
Image
You know, you can only cram your beliefs down a young kid's throat for so long before he goes, you know, the other side seems to be having a lot more fun.
Daniel Tosh
Image
If security guards aren't allowed to carry guns, I don't have to obey their made up rules.
Daniel Tosh
Image
I like my women like I like my coffee . . . I don’t like coffee.
Daniel Tosh
Image
It’s the ultimate pinnacle of stand-up to have an hour on HBO, but way more people see Comedy Central and they’ve been good to me.
Daniel Tosh
Image
You know what really keeps your staff on their toes? A harpoon gun.
Daniel Tosh
Image
People write a lot of similar material. That's why I try to come up with the most absurd jokes.
Daniel Tosh
Image
If you offer me a starring role in a movie, I have no interest.
Daniel Tosh
Image
The only advice I have for youth is to date outside your race. I just think it's so cute when I see little kids in interracial relationships it makes me feel like I'm watching a commercial.
Daniel Tosh
Image
Cheaters never prosper, unless they get away with it.
Daniel Tosh
Image
I heart abortion. Where's the shirt for that, urban outfitters?! And it won't be a normal heart. It'll be a dead infant heart. Y'know what the back will say? Problem Solved.
Daniel Tosh
Image
At least gays don't kill babies before their due date.
Daniel Tosh
Image
No touching... Cashmere is highly sensitive to the oil in poor people's fingers.
Daniel Tosh
Image
Is it okay to roofie a girl just to shut her up?
Daniel Tosh