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When I was researching my very first novel, The Basic Eight, I was calling right-wing political and religious organizations and asking them to mail me their material so that I could mock them in my novels.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
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Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
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Basic
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More quotes by Daniel Handler
Even the best plans can change if there's an accident.
Daniel Handler
The last time I saw you I was trying to throw thumbtacks into your cradle!
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Anyone who thinks the pen is mightier than the sword has not been stabbed with both.
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I can't imagine why you would want to take your child to see what the career of a writer is like, because it mostly consists of sitting in a room typing, or going to the library and looking something up. Those are not exciting things to watch.
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It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.
Daniel Handler
In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.
Daniel Handler
I hadn't even been looking, not for you, and now you were my heart's desire.
Daniel Handler
Taking one’s chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling comfortable and warm, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck.
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There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap, and it is better to stain the napkin than your clothing. The other is that it can serve as a perfect hiding place. Practically nobody is nosey enough to take the napkin off a lap to see what is hidden there.
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Announcing your death should be like announcing that you are a lunar moth: It must be done quietly or it will not be believed.
Daniel Handler
In times of extreme stress, one can often find energy hidden in even the most exhausted areas of the body.
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I go to bed early and rise late and feel as if I have hardly slept, probably because I have been reading almost the entire time.
Daniel Handler
Just because something is traditional is no reason to do it, of course. Piracy, for example, is a tradition that has been carried on for hundreds of years, but that doesn't mean we should all attack ships and steal their gold.
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I’m happier than a pig eating bacon!
Daniel Handler
I'm sure you have heard it said that appearance does not matter so much, and that it is what's on the inside that counts. This is, of course, utter nonsense, because if it were true then people who were good on this inside would would never have to comb their hair or take a bath, and the whole world would smell even worse than it already does.
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-Most people would say that she's beautiful. -That's because she's been with most people.
Daniel Handler
It is not the diamonds or the birds, the people or the potatoes, it is not any of the nouns. The miracle is the adverbs, the way things are done. It is the way love gets done despite every catastrophe.
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With a library it is easier to hope for serendipity than to look for a precise answer.
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It is a lonely feeling when someone you care about becomes a stranger.
Daniel Handler
I never want to be away from you again, except at work, in the restroom or when one of us is at a movie the other does not want to see.
Daniel Handler
