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So every so often, when I meet someone who's honestly appalled by my books and doesn't understand why they would be attractive to people... I find such people sort of charming, even though they usually don't like me.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
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Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
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More quotes by Daniel Handler
Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.
Daniel Handler
Perhaps if we saw what was ahead of us, and glimpsed the follies, and misfortunes that would befall us later on, we would all stay in our mother's wombs, and then there would be nobody in the world but a great number of very fat, very irritated women.
Daniel Handler
Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.
Daniel Handler
The right hand doesn’t know what the left is doing” is a phrase that refers to times when people ought to know, but don’t know, about something that is happening very close to them. For instance, you ought to know about the man who watches you when you sleep.
Daniel Handler
Wherever it's good, whatever strange, faraway land, let's go there, let's stay in that place alone.
Daniel Handler
One has to adopt a sort of Zen calm, in which you know you wrote the best book that you could at the time.
Daniel Handler
We are all told to ignore bullies. It's something they teach you, and they can teach you anything. It doesn't mean you learn it. It doesn't mean you believe it. One should never ignore bullies. One should stop them.
Daniel Handler
Xenial' is a word which refers to the giving of gifts to strangers. . . . I know that having a good vocabulary doesn't guarantee that I'm a good person. . . . But it does mean I've read a great deal. And in my experience, well-read people are less likely to be evil.
Daniel Handler
The sad truth is the truth is sad.
Daniel Handler
I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get into a huge war over a piece of jewelry that everybody wants but nobody can wear.
Daniel Handler
Count Olaf certainly does sound evil. Imagine forcing children to stand near a stove!
Daniel Handler
...the moron who thought love was forever.
Daniel Handler
If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed, but most of us would say something more along the lines of, Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!
Daniel Handler
I found powerful the idea that everything we have is, in effect, stolen from everybody else.
Daniel Handler
Lately it has become more and more difficult to attend dinner parties without the evening ending in gunfire or tapioca.
Daniel Handler
It is terribly rude to tell people that their troubles are boring.
Daniel Handler
There are so many movies like this, where you thought you were smarter than the screen but the director was smarter than you, of course he's the one, of course it was a dream, of course she's dead, of course, it's hidden right there, of course it's the truth and you in your seat have failed to notice in the dark.
Daniel Handler
I can't imagine why you would want to take your child to see what the career of a writer is like, because it mostly consists of sitting in a room typing, or going to the library and looking something up. Those are not exciting things to watch.
Daniel Handler
There are some who go through life with a shadow hanging over them, particularly if they live in a building which has long wide awnings.
Daniel Handler
and what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey.
Daniel Handler