Quote

There is a pair of snakes who have learned to drive a car so recklessly that they would run you over in the street and never stop to apologize.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Street
Car
Recklessly
Streets
Apologize
Learned
Snakes
Stop
Apologizing
Running
Pair
Never
Pairs
Would
Drive

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Goodness! Golly! Good God! Blessed Allah! Zeus and Hera! Mary and Joseph! Nathaniel Hawthorne! Don't touch her! Grab her! Move closer! Run away! Don't move! Kill the snake! Leave it alone! Give it some food! Don't let it bite her! Lure the snake away! Here, snakey! Here, snakey snakey!
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I was not a particularly brave child, I think, because I had a narrative mind, because my mind automatically went to any terrible thing that could happen.
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Wherever it's good, whatever strange, faraway land, let's go there, let's stay in that place alone.
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This story is about the Baudelaires. And they are the sort of people who know that there’s always something. Something to invent, something to read, something to bite, and something to do, to make a sanctuary, no matter how small. And for this reason, I am happy to say, the Baudelaires were very fortunate indeed.
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There are few sights sadder than a ruined book.
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No reality has the power to dispel a dream.
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I want to love you and take you pretty places. Yes, I have things wrong, but also I can walk through walls if you'll let me show you.
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Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or how often they should appear.
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So she loved him. She just did immediately and again often and clearly naturally and soundly and obviously and many others.
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The Basic Eight and Watch Your Mouth both have first-person voices, and I ended up investigating those voices and investing so much in them that I think many people took them more seriously than they ought to have.
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For Beatrice, when we met, my life began. Soon afterwards, yours ended.
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Knowing that something is wrong and doing it anyway happens very often in life, and I doubt I will ever know why.
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In times of extreme stress, one can often find energy hidden in even the most exhausted areas of the body.
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Lately it has become more and more difficult to attend dinner parties without the evening ending in gunfire or tapioca.
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There are some secrets you want to keep to yourself, even if they don't matter. They might only matter if you keep them secret.
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I can't imagine why you would want to take your child to see what the career of a writer is like, because it mostly consists of sitting in a room typing, or going to the library and looking something up. Those are not exciting things to watch.
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Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel, because you rarely meet someone who has one, and when you do, it makes you want to hide under the coffee table.
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I was so grateful that Lemony Snicket wasn't the worst movie ever made that I overlooked many things that might have otherwise upset me.
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I'm not very good at the accordion. If I played guitar, I wouldn't be on anyone's album. But because I play the accordion and no one else does, I end up doing strange things.
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I can't think of a story that doesn't have something terrible in it. Otherwise, it's dull. So when I embarked into the world of picture books, my first thought was to do something about the dark.
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