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All his life, Klaus had believed that if you read enough books, you could solve any problem, but now he wasn't so sure.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Sure
Read
Problem
Book
Klaus
Enough
Believed
Life
Solve
Wasn
Books

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It is always cruel to laugh at people, of course, although sometimes if they are wearing an ugly hat it is hard to control yourself.
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Sometime during your life—in fact, very soon—you may find yourself reading a book, and you may notice that a book’s first sentence can often tell you what sort of story your book contains.
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The way sadness works is one of the strangest riddles of the world.
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If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed, but most of us would say something more along the lines of, Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!
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The trick to following someone without getting caught is to follow somebody who doesn't think they're being followed.
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Hup hup ha ha hammy hee hee!
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When do you learn that the world, like any diner worth its salt, is open twenty-four hours a day?
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There are many things in life that become different if you take a long look at them.
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Every last souvenir of the love we had, the prizes & the debris of this relationship, like the glitter in the gutter when the parade has passed, all the everything & whatnot kicked to the curb.
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It was a secret time and place, you next to me, untraceable and out of this world
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I write storys to entertain not to be the best
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...that's not why we broke up. I love it, I miss it, I hate to give it back to you, this complicated thing, it's why we stayed together
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Instead of the word 'love' there was an enormous heart, a symbol sometimes used by people who have trouble figuring out the difference between words and shapes.
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The end of 'The End' is the best place to begin 'The End', because if you read 'The End' from the beginning of the beginning of 'The End' to the end of the end of 'The End', you will arrive at the end.
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For Beatrice, when we first met, I was lonely, and you were pretty. Now I am pretty lonely.
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Life isn't fair, he said, in his undisguised voice, and for once the Baudelaire orphans agreed with every word the man said.
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Or why you are wearing a picture of Santa Clause on you shirts, but-” “It’s Herman Melville.
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Every new promise was like something heavy I had to carry, with no place to put anything down.
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A girl meets a boy, Ed, and everything changes, or so she says.
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