Quote

I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get into a huge war over a piece of jewelry that everybody wants but nobody can wear.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Things
Huge
Elves
Wants
Jewelry
Everybody
Reminded
Read
Bunch
War
Piece
Father
Wear
Used
Nobody
Book
Pieces

More quotes by Daniel Handler

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I never want to be away from you again, except at work, in the restroom or when one of us is at a movie the other does not want to see.
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We are all told to ignore bullies. It's something they teach you, and they can teach you anything. It doesn't mean you learn it. It doesn't mean you believe it. One should never ignore bullies. One should stop them.
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I stayed there loving you, though the love made me, not sad but I guess melancholy, for a reason I couldn’t point to.
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Sooner or later, everyone's story has an unfortunate event or two...The solution, of course, is to stay as far away from the world as possible and lead a safe, simple life.
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If writers wrote as carelessly as some people talk, then adhasdh asdglaseuyt[bn[ pasdlgkhasdfasdf.
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I first told the idea to an editor I had met who, after reading one of my novels for adults that was set in a high school, had an idea that I might write something for children.
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Appearance matters a great deal because you can often tell a lot about people by looking at how they present themselves.
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It is not the diamonds or the birds, the people or the potatoes, it is not any of the nouns. The miracle is the adverbs, the way things are done. It is the way love gets done despite every catastrophe.
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Fetching objects for people who are too lazy to fetch them for themselves is never a pleasant task, particularly when the people are insulting you.
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When trouble strikes, head to the library. You will either be able to solve the problem, or simply have something to read as the world crashes down around you.
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Just about everybody has written a first novel that they throw away before writing their actual first novel.
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There is a pair of snakes who have learned to drive a car so recklessly that they would run you over in the street and never stop to apologize.
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People worry more about girls, for a good reason: I don't think my parents thought I was going to be raped by a classmate or attacked when I was walking alone in some neighborhood. So it's not just paranoid parents.
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I write storys to entertain not to be the best
Daniel Handler
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I liked, I admit, that we didn’t pretend there hadn’t been other girls. There was always a girl on you in the halls at school, like they came free with a backpack.
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If you don’t care about something, one way to demonstrate your feelings is to say the word and then repeat the word with the letters S-C-H-M replacing the first letters. Somebody who didn’t care about dentists, for instance could say ‘Dentist, schmentists.
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A bolt from the blue.
Daniel Handler
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This is an absurd moral, for you and I both know that sometimes not only is it good to lie, it is necessary to lie.
Daniel Handler
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Having an aura of menace is like having a pet weasel, because you rarely meet someone who has one, and when you do, it makes you want to hide under the coffee table.
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I think I’ve always believed that there is one person in the universe who you’re truly meant for–for whom you are truly meant–and the fact that sometimes there are two or even more people on the earth you can fall in love with really bothers me. It suggests that if you work hard you can be meant for anyone.
Daniel Handler