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Stretched out in front of me was my time as an adult, and then a skeleton, and then nothing except perhaps a few books on a few shelves.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Stretched
Books
Book
Shelves
Nothing
Adult
Time
Adults
Fronts
Front
Skeleton
Except
Skeletons
Perhaps
More quotes by Daniel Handler
To stutter through it with you or even stop stuttering and say nothing, was so lucky and soft, better talk than mile-a-minute with anyone. After a few minutes we’d stop rattling, we’d adjust, we’d settle in, and the conversation would speed into the night.
Daniel Handler
I kind of always think my work is unfilmable, and when I meet people who are interested in filming it, I'm always stunned.
Daniel Handler
Just because something is typed-whether it is typed on a business card or typed in a newspaper or book-this does not mean that it is true.
Daniel Handler
Like a lot of people whose children were small in the 2000s, I read [Daniel Handler] books out loud and I loved them.
Daniel Handler
E! Klaus cried. E as in Exit! The Baudelaires ran down E as in Exit, but when they reached the last cabinet, the row was becoming F as in Falling File Cabinets, G as in Go the Other Way! and H as in How in the World Are We Going to Escape?
Daniel Handler
If you wish to avoid an unpleasant story you had best put this book down
Daniel Handler
There are many things in life that become different if you take a long look at them.
Daniel Handler
The file clanked against me, my stupid idea nobody would have gotten had I ever done it. You even wouldn't have gotten it, Ed, I thought, watching her go. It's why we broke up, so here it is. Ed, how could you?
Daniel Handler
It is almost as if happiness is an acquired taste, like coconut cordial or ceviche, to which you can eventually become accustomed, but despair is something surprising each time you encounter it.
Daniel Handler
A successful villain should have all these things at his or her villainous fingertips, or else give up villainy altogether and try to lead a life of decency, integrity, and kindness, which is much more challenging and noble, if not always quite as exciting.
Daniel Handler
There is nothing particularly wrong with salmon, of course, but like caramel candy, strawberry yogurt, or liquid carpet cleaner, if you eat too much of it you are not going to enjoy your meal.
Daniel Handler
That night it felt that somehow by flicking them off the roof, the matches would burn down everything, the sparks from the tips of the flames, torching the world and all the heartbroken people in it.
Daniel Handler
I liked, I admit, that we didn’t pretend there hadn’t been other girls. There was always a girl on you in the halls at school, like they came free with a backpack.
Daniel Handler
In America now there is this phenomenon called helicopter parenting, where you're hovering over your child for the whole time. Parents there view their job as being to make sure their kid never has a moment of unhappiness. Of course, as a parent myself, I can understand the urge, but I don't know whether it would be healthy or possible.
Daniel Handler
This toast feels raw. Is it safe to eat raw toast?
Daniel Handler
When you say, History is written by the winners, you like to think about someone who isn't you. You want to think, Oh, that's the juggernaut I'm standing against. But you're probably part of it.
Daniel Handler
I love no one but you, I have discovered, but you are far away and I am here alone. Then this is my life and maybe, however unlikely, I'll find my way back there. Or maybe, one day, I'll settle for second best. And on that same day, hell will freeze over, the sun will burn out and the stars will fall from the sky.
Daniel Handler
For Beatrice, summer without you is as cold as winter. Winter without you, is even colder.
Daniel Handler
This is my knife. It is very sharp and very eager to hurt you.
Daniel Handler
They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
Daniel Handler