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Stretched out in front of me was my time as an adult, and then a skeleton, and then nothing except perhaps a few books on a few shelves.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Perhaps
Skeletons
Books
Stretched
Book
Shelves
Nothing
Adult
Time
Adults
Fronts
Front
Except
Skeleton
More quotes by Daniel Handler
With the publishing of The Basic Eight, it was often assumed that I was really immature and callow, and with the publishing of Watch Your Mouth, it was assumed that I was oversexualized, and with Lemony Snicket, it's often assumed that I'm erudite and depressed. But all the voices more or less came naturally to me.
Daniel Handler
I stayed there loving you, though the love made me, not sad but I guess melancholy, for a reason I couldn’t point to.
Daniel Handler
It is always tedious when someone tells you that if you don't stop crying, they will give you something to cry about, because if you are crying then you already have something to cry about, and so there is no reason for them to give you anything additional to cry about, thank you very much.
Daniel Handler
But I must admit I miss you terribly. The world is too quiet without you nearby.
Daniel Handler
I kind of always think my work is unfilmable, and when I meet people who are interested in filming it, I'm always stunned.
Daniel Handler
There is no easy way to train an apprentice. My two tools are example and nagging.
Daniel Handler
There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap, and it is better to stain the napkin than your clothing. The other is that it can serve as a perfect hiding place. Practically nobody is nosey enough to take the napkin off a lap to see what is hidden there.
Daniel Handler
If an optimist had his left arm chewed off by an alligator, he might say in a pleasant and hopeful voice, Well this isn't too bad, I don't have a left arm anymore but at least nobody will ever ask me if I'm left-handed or right-handed, but most of us would say something more along the lines of, Aaaaaa! My arm! My arm!
Daniel Handler
I’m not a cuckoo, either. I’m a fool is what.
Daniel Handler
A new experience can be extremely pleasurable, or extremely irritating, or somewhere in between, and you never know until you try it out.
Daniel Handler
Mostly, it's flattering to meet fans. As long as it's in a planned, professional meeting, rather than, say, someone dropping by my home, which is not as pleasant.
Daniel Handler
If you have ever had a miserable experience, then you have probably had it said to you that you would feel better in the morning. This, of course, is utter nonsense, because a miserable experience remains a miserable experience even on the loveliest of morning.
Daniel Handler
The sad truth is the truth is sad.
Daniel Handler
We laughed the rest of the way, because the point of this story is, it is not the cookies. It is the love.
Daniel Handler
It is terribly rude to tell people that their troubles are boring.
Daniel Handler
In times of extreme stress, one can often find energy hidden in even the most exhausted areas of the body.
Daniel Handler
It is always sad when someone leaves home, unless they are simply going around the corner and will return in a few minutes with ice-cream sandwiches.
Daniel Handler
For every teenager I know, having a phone is a mixed blessing, because your parents can press a button and figure out where you are.
Daniel Handler
One wanders through life as if wandering through a field in the dark of night, wearing a blindfold and very heavy shoes, with a poisonous toad waiting patiently beneath a clump of weeds, knowing full well that eventually you will step on him.
Daniel Handler
Most schools have a loud system of loud bells, which startle the students and teachers at regular intervals and remind them that time is passing even more slowly than it seems.
Daniel Handler
