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It is easy to decide on what is wrong to wear to a party, such as deep-sea diving equipment or a pair of large pillows, but deciding what is right is much trickier.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Right
Decide
Trickier
Much
Wear
Pillows
Sea
Diving
Large
Deciding
Deep
Pillow
Party
Pair
Wrong
Equipment
Easy
Pairs
More quotes by Daniel Handler
This is like a cookie, it tastes like a cookie having sex with a doughnut.
Daniel Handler
A long time ago, there was no such thing as school, and children spent their days learning a trade, a phrase which here means standing around doing tedious tasks under the instruction of a bossy adult. In time, however, people realized that the children could be allowed to sit, and the first school was invented.
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You would run much slower if you were dragging something behind you, like a knapsack or a sheriff.
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Beef. Yes. Roast beef. It's the Swedish term for beef that is roasted.
Daniel Handler
There was still plenty of water in the basement, and I felt it soaking me from the knees on down. If someone wanted to torture me until I told them a critical piece of information, all they would have to do is get my socks wet. It feels terrible.
Daniel Handler
I often can't remember which scenes are and aren't in the final product, because I saw so many different versions of the Lemony Snicket that I forget which ended up on the cutting-room floor.
Daniel Handler
Waiting is one of life’s hardships.
Daniel Handler
And when love is over when the diner of love seems closed from the outside you want all those hours back along with anything you left at the lover’s house and maybe a couple of things which aren’t technically yours on the grounds that you wasted a portion of your life and those hours have all gone southside.
Daniel Handler
Nobody wants to hear that you will try your best. It is the wrong thing to say. It is like saying 'I probably won't hit you with a shovel.' Suddenly everyone is afraid you will do the opposite.
Daniel Handler
There are so many movies like this, where you thought you were smarter than the screen but the director was smarter than you, of course he's the one, of course it was a dream, of course she's dead, of course, it's hidden right there, of course it's the truth and you in your seat have failed to notice in the dark.
Daniel Handler
To stutter through it with you or even stop stuttering and say nothing, was so lucky and soft, better talk than mile-a-minute with anyone. After a few minutes we’d stop rattling, we’d adjust, we’d settle in, and the conversation would speed into the night.
Daniel Handler
They say love's like a bus, and if you wait long enough another one will come along, but not in this place where the buses are slow and most of the cute ones are gay.
Daniel Handler
Even the best plans can change if there's an accident.
Daniel Handler
All cannot be lost when there is still so much being found
Daniel Handler
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you, and there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
Daniel Handler
This toast feels raw. Is it safe to eat raw toast?
Daniel Handler
I can't think of a story that doesn't have something terrible in it. Otherwise, it's dull. So when I embarked into the world of picture books, my first thought was to do something about the dark.
Daniel Handler
My chauffer once told me that I would feel better in the morning, but when I woke up the two of us were still on a tiny island surrounded by man-eating crocodiles, and, as I'm sure you can understand, I didn't feel any better about it.
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I like to think that I get better and better as a writer, but it seems pretty easy to me to slip on disguises of various people.
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I think I’ve always believed that there is one person in the universe who you’re truly meant for–for whom you are truly meant–and the fact that sometimes there are two or even more people on the earth you can fall in love with really bothers me. It suggests that if you work hard you can be meant for anyone.
Daniel Handler
