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You can't believe everything you read.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Read
Everything
Believe

More quotes by Daniel Handler

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Instead of the word 'love' there was an enormous heart, a symbol sometimes used by people who have trouble figuring out the difference between words and shapes.
Daniel Handler
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I found powerful the idea that everything we have is, in effect, stolen from everybody else.
Daniel Handler
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It is useless for me to describe to you how terrible Violet, Klaus, and even Sunny felt in the time that followed. If you have ever lost someone very important to you, then you already know how it feels, and if you haven't, you cannot possibly imagine it.
Daniel Handler
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Wherever it's good, whatever strange, faraway land, let's go there, let's stay in that place alone.
Daniel Handler
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The story of the Baudelaires takes place in a very real world, where some people are laughed at just because they have something wrong with them, and where children can find themselves all alone in the world, struggling to understand the mystery that surrounds them.
Daniel Handler
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Hup hup ha ha hammy hee hee!
Daniel Handler
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For Beatrice- My love for you shall live forever. You, however, did not.
Daniel Handler
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If he’s not gay and he hung out with you the whole time, he wanted to be. It’s boyfriend or want to be boyfriend or I guess gay. Those are the choices.
Daniel Handler
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Of course I'm trying to trick you! That's the way of the world, Baudelaires. Everyone runs around with their secrets and their schemes, trying to outwit everyone else.
Daniel Handler
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Never, under any circumstances, let the Virginian wolfsnake near a typewriter.
Daniel Handler
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There was still plenty of water in the basement, and I felt it soaking me from the knees on down. If someone wanted to torture me until I told them a critical piece of information, all they would have to do is get my socks wet. It feels terrible.
Daniel Handler
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Anyone who thinks the pen is mightier than the sword has not been stabbed with both.
Daniel Handler
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All cannot be lost when there is still so much being found
Daniel Handler
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Taking one’s chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling comfortable and warm, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck.
Daniel Handler
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There are two types of panicking: standing still and not saying a word, and leaping all over the place babbling anything that comes into your head.
Daniel Handler
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The Basic Eight and Watch Your Mouth both have first-person voices, and I ended up investigating those voices and investing so much in them that I think many people took them more seriously than they ought to have.
Daniel Handler
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It has been said that the hardest job in the world is raising a child, but the people who says this have probably never worked at a comb factory or captured pirates on the high seas.
Daniel Handler
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For every teenager I know, having a phone is a mixed blessing, because your parents can press a button and figure out where you are.
Daniel Handler
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The thing you hope will never happen to you might just happen to someone else instead, who has been spending their life dreading the thing that will happen to you.
Daniel Handler
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Like People, animals will become frightened and likely do whatever you say if you whip them enough.
Daniel Handler