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I started making plans, thinking we would get that far.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Plans
Started
Making
Would
Thinking

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For Beatrice, summer without you is as cold as winter. Winter without you, is even colder.
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For Beatrice- My love for you shall live forever. You, however, did not.
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Sometime during your life—in fact, very soon—you may find yourself reading a book, and you may notice that a book’s first sentence can often tell you what sort of story your book contains.
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When I was researching my very first novel, The Basic Eight, I was calling right-wing political and religious organizations and asking them to mail me their material so that I could mock them in my novels.
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Shyness is a curious thing, because, like quicksand, it can strike people at any time, and also, like quicksand, it usually makes its victims look down.
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They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
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I opened my mouth and kissed you then, the first time all night, attacked you and surrendered completely, and let’s get out of here. I’m ready, I’m finished, let’s not break up, no, no. Take me home, my boyfriend, my love.
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Neither were you [born yesterday], unless of course I am wrong, in which case welcome to the world, little baby, and congratulations on learning to read so early in life.
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If you have ever had a miserable experience, then you have probably had it said to you that you would feel better in the morning. This, of course, is utter nonsense, because a miserable experience remains a miserable experience even on the loveliest of morning.
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I found powerful the idea that everything we have is, in effect, stolen from everybody else.
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I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get into a huge war over a piece of jewelry that everybody wants but nobody can wear.
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Anyone who thinks the pen is mightier than the sword has not been stabbed with both.
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Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree, because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch, or you might simply get covered in sap, and for this reason many people choose to spend their time alone and indoors, where it is harder to get a splinter.
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I know what is going on, said Sir. I am the Boss! Of course I know!
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Are you ready? Klaus asked finally. No, Sunny answered. Me neither, Violet said, but if we wait until we're ready we'll be waiting for the rest of our lives, Let's go.
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You would run much slower if you were dragging something behind you, like a knapsack or a sheriff.
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Instead of the word 'love' there was an enormous heart, a symbol sometimes used by people who have trouble figuring out the difference between words and shapes.
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It was a secret time and place, you next to me, untraceable and out of this world
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