Quote

Never mind what my name is,” the man said. “No one can pronounce it anyway. Just call me Sir.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Name
Names
Call
Mind
Never
Men
Pronounce
Anyway

More quotes by Daniel Handler

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It is very frustrating not to be understood in this world. If you say one thing and keep being told that you mean something else, it can make you want to scream. But somewhere in the world there is a place for all of us, whether you are an electric form of decoration, peppermint-scented sweet, a source of timber, or a potato pancake.
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It is terribly rude to tell people that their troubles are boring.
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You can't believe everything you read.
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Certain people have said that the world is like a calm pond, and that anytime a person does even the smallest thing, it is as if a stone has dropped into the pond, spreading circles of ripples further and further out, until the entire world has been changed by one tiny action.
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Why not rise from the grave and terrorize a little instead of staying buried and dead in the cemetery?
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Well-read people are less likely to be evil.
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Keep anyone with whom you can read in silence.
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For Beatrice, when we first met, I was lonely, and you were pretty. Now I am pretty lonely.
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Every new promise was like something heavy I had to carry, with no place to put anything down.
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Can't we sleep ten minutes more? I was having a lovely dream about sneezing without covering my mouth, and giving everybody germs.
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And then like a song we'd forgotten was even on the mix, you stepped into the house and my whole life.
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Announcing your death should be like announcing that you are a lunar moth: It must be done quietly or it will not be believed.
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For Beatrice, when we met, my life began. Soon afterwards, yours ended.
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You might be afraid of the dark, but the dark is not afraid of you. That’s why the dark is always close by.
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I have a dream of what would have happened if what happened instead hadn't.
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There is a pair of snakes who have learned to drive a car so recklessly that they would run you over in the street and never stop to apologize.
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Is it fair for the bears to come down to where humans live, looking for food? Is it fair for the Duke's soldiers to shoot at them? Is it fair for the bears to crush them with giant snowballs? Often, if you point out something that isn't fair, someone will reply, Life isn't fair. What is to be done with such people?
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In America now there is this phenomenon called helicopter parenting, where you're hovering over your child for the whole time. Parents there view their job as being to make sure their kid never has a moment of unhappiness. Of course, as a parent myself, I can understand the urge, but I don't know whether it would be healthy or possible.
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The file clanked against me, my stupid idea nobody would have gotten had I ever done it. You even wouldn't have gotten it, Ed, I thought, watching her go. It's why we broke up, so here it is. Ed, how could you?
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I'm sure you have heard it said that appearance does not matter so much, and that it is what's on the inside that counts. This is, of course, utter nonsense, because if it were true then people who were good on this inside would would never have to comb their hair or take a bath, and the whole world would smell even worse than it already does.
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