Quote

Chestnuts in stuffing tastes like someone chewed up a tree branch and then French-kissed it into your mouth.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Taste
Chestnuts
Tree
Branch
Someone
Kissed
Like
Tastes
Branches
French
Mouth
Chewed
Mouths
Stuffing

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I opened my mouth and kissed you then, the first time all night, attacked you and surrendered completely, and let’s get out of here. I’m ready, I’m finished, let’s not break up, no, no. Take me home, my boyfriend, my love.
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I stand entwined in fire on the inextinguishable bonfire of inconceivable love.
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Complimenting someone in an exaggerated way is known as flattery, and flattery will generally get you anything you want.
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I know what is going on, said Sir. I am the Boss! Of course I know!
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It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.
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I always think it's silly when people talk about works of culture taking risks. Because there's not any risk involved.
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It seemed to me that every adult did something terrible sooner or later. And every child, I thought, sooner or later becomes an adult.
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Dead women tell no tales. Sad men write them down.
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They were almond cookies, although they could have been made of spinach and shoes for all I cared. I ate eleven of them, right in a row. It is rude to take the last cookie.
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...you know that a good, long session of weeping can often make you feel better, even if your circumstances have not changed one bit.
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We are a nation of children letting horrible things happen, and flunking Calc.
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To stutter through it with you or even stop stuttering and say nothing, was so lucky and soft, better talk than mile-a-minute with anyone. After a few minutes we’d stop rattling, we’d adjust, we’d settle in, and the conversation would speed into the night.
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If you are interested in happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book. In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle. This is because not very many happy things happened in the lives of the three Baudelaire youngsters.
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...in life it is often the tiny details that end up being the most important.
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For Beatrice- My love for you shall live forever. You, however, did not.
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Tell me what it is, or prepare to eat harpoon.
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Mostly, it's flattering to meet fans. As long as it's in a planned, professional meeting, rather than, say, someone dropping by my home, which is not as pleasant.
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Miracles can happen, even to those who are small, flammable, and dressed all in black.
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