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You should never stick something that you are allergic to into your mouth, especially if that thing is cats.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Cat
Sticks
Mouth
Mouths
Especially
Thing
Allergic
Something
Cats
Never
Stick
More quotes by Daniel Handler
I think I’ve always believed that there is one person in the universe who you’re truly meant for–for whom you are truly meant–and the fact that sometimes there are two or even more people on the earth you can fall in love with really bothers me. It suggests that if you work hard you can be meant for anyone.
Daniel Handler
I gasped and pointed the way. I gave you an adventure, Ed, right in front of you but you never saw it until I showed you, and that's why we broke up.
Daniel Handler
It is always cruel to laugh at people, of course, although sometimes if they are wearing an ugly hat it is hard to control yourself.
Daniel Handler
It is very easy to say that the important thing is to try your best, but if you are in real trouble the most important thing is not trying your best, but getting to safety.
Daniel Handler
I was not a particularly brave child, I think, because I had a narrative mind, because my mind automatically went to any terrible thing that could happen.
Daniel Handler
For Beatrice- When we were together I felt breathless. Now you are.
Daniel Handler
When you start reading nonfiction books about piracy, you realize that it's actually just a history of desperate people.
Daniel Handler
I’m not a cuckoo, either. I’m a fool is what.
Daniel Handler
This is an absurd moral, for you and I both know that sometimes not only is it good to lie, it is necessary to lie.
Daniel Handler
But it's far too late for us ring, hair, letters, photographs - all traces of our love will be scattered then, like an anagram.
Daniel Handler
All cannot be lost when there is still so much being found
Daniel Handler
Love was in the air, so both of us walked through love on our way to the corner.
Daniel Handler
If you have ever had a miserable experience, then you have probably had it said to you that you would feel better in the morning. This, of course, is utter nonsense, because a miserable experience remains a miserable experience even on the loveliest of morning.
Daniel Handler
If you wish to avoid an unpleasant story you had best put this book down
Daniel Handler
It was darker than a pitch-black panther, covered in tar, eating black licorice at the very bottom of the deepest part of the Black Sea.
Daniel Handler
I found powerful the idea that everything we have is, in effect, stolen from everybody else.
Daniel Handler
Goodness! Golly! Good God! Blessed Allah! Zeus and Hera! Mary and Joseph! Nathaniel Hawthorne! Don't touch her! Grab her! Move closer! Run away! Don't move! Kill the snake! Leave it alone! Give it some food! Don't let it bite her! Lure the snake away! Here, snakey! Here, snakey snakey!
Daniel Handler
It is almost as if happiness is an acquired taste, like coconut cordial or ceviche, to which you can eventually become accustomed, but despair is something surprising each time you encounter it.
Daniel Handler
The rinsed foam swirled into one drain that always clogged come October when the maples dropped Canadian propaganda over everything.
Daniel Handler
Strange as it may seem, I still hope for the best, even though the best, like an interesting piece of mail, so rarely arrives, and even when it does it can be lost so easily.
Daniel Handler
