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For Beatrice, summer without you is as cold as winter. Winter without you, is even colder.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Winter
Summer
Cold
Without
Even
Beatrice
Colder

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I'm not very good at the accordion. If I played guitar, I wouldn't be on anyone's album. But because I play the accordion and no one else does, I end up doing strange things.
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This is love if it's not with you, a terrible fiery something that makes people look away, and it feels like a punch in the throat.
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Knowing that something is wrong and doing it anyway happens very often in life, and I doubt I will ever know why.
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You’re just jealous of me because I’m a tap-dancing ballerina fairy princess veterinarian!
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So every so often, when I meet someone who's honestly appalled by my books and doesn't understand why they would be attractive to people... I find such people sort of charming, even though they usually don't like me.
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Just about everybody has written a first novel that they throw away before writing their actual first novel.
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You can't believe everything you read.
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In love, as in life, one misheard word can be tremendously important. If you tell someone you love them, for instance, you must be absolutely certain that they have replied I love you back and not I love your back before you continue the conversation.
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This story is about the Baudelaires. And they are the sort of people who know that there’s always something. Something to invent, something to read, something to bite, and something to do, to make a sanctuary, no matter how small. And for this reason, I am happy to say, the Baudelaires were very fortunate indeed.
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One has to adopt a sort of Zen calm, in which you know you wrote the best book that you could at the time.
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You may be right,' she said, a phrase which here meant 'I’m wrong, but I don’t have the courage to say so.
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Someone can break your heart, leave you dead on the lawn, and still you never learn what to say to stop it all over again.
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If everyone fought fire with fire, the whole world would go up in smoke.
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If only Uncle Monty knew what we know, Violet said, and Stephano knew that he knew what we know. But Uncle Monty doesn't know what we know, and Stephano knows that he doesn't know what we know. I know, Klause said. I know you know, Violet said
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Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
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If you have ever had a miserable experience, then you have probably had it said to you that you would feel better in the morning. This, of course, is utter nonsense, because a miserable experience remains a miserable experience even on the loveliest of morning.
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After a certain age, you couldn't even say where you were from. You went someplace, and lived there. And then you went someplace else.
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There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap, and it is better to stain the napkin than your clothing. The other is that it can serve as a perfect hiding place. Practically nobody is nosey enough to take the napkin off a lap to see what is hidden there.
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All his life, Klaus had believed that if you read enough books, you could solve any problem, but now he wasn't so sure.
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They were almond cookies, although they could have been made of spinach and shoes for all I cared. I ate eleven of them, right in a row. It is rude to take the last cookie.
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