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We need things, and the opposite of them, and we are so rarely completely comfortable.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Opposite
Opposites
Completely
Comfortable
Need
Needs
Things
Rarely

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For every teenager I know, having a phone is a mixed blessing, because your parents can press a button and figure out where you are.
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A successful villain should have all these things at his or her villainous fingertips, or else give up villainy altogether and try to lead a life of decency, integrity, and kindness, which is much more challenging and noble, if not always quite as exciting.
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Deciding whether or not to trust a person is like deciding whether or not to climb a tree, because you might get a wonderful view from the highest branch, or you might simply get covered in sap, and for this reason many people choose to spend their time alone and indoors, where it is harder to get a splinter.
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Even the best plans can change if there's an accident.
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People worry more about girls, for a good reason: I don't think my parents thought I was going to be raped by a classmate or attacked when I was walking alone in some neighborhood. So it's not just paranoid parents.
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Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or how often they should appear.
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This is love if it's not with you, a terrible fiery something that makes people look away, and it feels like a punch in the throat.
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Most schools have a loud system of loud bells, which startle the students and teachers at regular intervals and remind them that time is passing even more slowly than it seems.
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It is difficult, when faced with a situation you cannot control, to admit you can do nothing.
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Arguing with somebody is never pleasant, but sometimes it is useful and necessary to do so.
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Well-read people are less likely to be evil.
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There is no worse sound in the world than someone who cannot play the violin but insists on doing so anyway.
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...the moron who thought love was forever.
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I wrote Rick before I was published, and I had no vision of it, really. It was just a story that occurred to me, and that put its little claws in my brain, and I wrote it, and I showed it to a couple people, and they all said, This is ghastly.
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You might be afraid of the dark, but the dark is not afraid of you. That’s why the dark is always close by.
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I’m reminded of a book my father used to read me,” she said. “A bunch of elves and things get into a huge war over a piece of jewelry that everybody wants but nobody can wear.
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It is always terrible to be told to go play with people one doesn't know.
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Opera was an enormous part of my childhood. My parents were both opera buffs, and they met in the box seat of an opera performance. And I also was a boy soprano, so before puberty hit, I was onstage playing a wide variety of orphans and urchins in all sorts of operas, and the sheer melodrama of their stories was just always appealing to me.
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Beef. Yes. Roast beef. It's the Swedish term for beef that is roasted.
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I often can't remember which scenes are and aren't in the final product, because I saw so many different versions of the Lemony Snicket that I forget which ended up on the cutting-room floor.
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