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Fetching objects for people who are too lazy to fetch them for themselves is never a pleasant task, particularly when the people are insulting you.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
People
Insulting
Lazy
Pleasant
Task
Particularly
Tasks
Objects
Fetching
Never
Fetch
More quotes by Daniel Handler
who would dare think that, forever? Some idiot girl who wouldn’t know how things played out.
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There are many things in life that become different if you take a long look at them.
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You might be afraid of the dark, but the dark is not afraid of you. That’s why the dark is always close by.
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Love was in the air, so both of us walked through love on our way to the corner.
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It was darker than a pitch-black panther, covered in tar, eating black licorice at the very bottom of the deepest part of the Black Sea.
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There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap, and it is better to stain the napkin than your clothing. The other is that it can serve as a perfect hiding place. Practically nobody is nosey enough to take the napkin off a lap to see what is hidden there.
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I have a dream of what would have happened if what happened instead hadn't.
Daniel Handler
Mostly, it's flattering to meet fans. As long as it's in a planned, professional meeting, rather than, say, someone dropping by my home, which is not as pleasant.
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I like to think that I get better and better as a writer, but it seems pretty easy to me to slip on disguises of various people.
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One can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways.
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If you are interested in happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book. In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle. This is because not very many happy things happened in the lives of the three Baudelaire youngsters.
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It is not the diamonds or the birds, the people or the potatoes, it is not any of the nouns. The miracle is the adverbs, the way things are done. It is the way love gets done despite every catastrophe.
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I always think it's silly when people talk about works of culture taking risks. Because there's not any risk involved.
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For Beatrice - you will always be in my mind, in my heart and in your grave.
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I like writing for movies. It's nice to be alone working on fiction in your room, and then it's nice to be in a room with a bunch of people working on a movie.
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All his life, Klaus had believed that if you read enough books, you could solve any problem, but now he wasn't so sure.
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For every teenager I know, having a phone is a mixed blessing, because your parents can press a button and figure out where you are.
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A long time ago, there was no such thing as school, and children spent their days learning a trade, a phrase which here means standing around doing tedious tasks under the instruction of a bossy adult. In time, however, people realized that the children could be allowed to sit, and the first school was invented.
Daniel Handler
Everyone tells you it's all right to cry, but not enough people say it's all right if you don't want people to know.
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Why not rise from the grave and terrorize a little instead of staying buried and dead in the cemetery?
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