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It has been said that the hardest job in the world is raising a child, but the people who says this have probably never worked at a comb factory or captured pirates on the high seas.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
World
Worked
Pirate
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Says
Seas
Probably
Factory
Child
Captured
High
Factories
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Raising
Comb
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Never
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Combs
More quotes by Daniel Handler
It is not always the job of people shouting outside impressive buildings to solve problems. It is often the job of the people inside, who have paper, pens, desks, and an impressive view.
Daniel Handler
Announcing your death should be like announcing that you are a lunar moth: It must be done quietly or it will not be believed.
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If you enjoy books with happy endings than you are better off reading some other book.
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Everyone tells you it's all right to cry, but not enough people say it's all right if you don't want people to know.
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I kind of always think my work is unfilmable, and when I meet people who are interested in filming it, I'm always stunned.
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For every teenager I know, having a phone is a mixed blessing, because your parents can press a button and figure out where you are.
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Lately it has become more and more difficult to attend dinner parties without the evening ending in gunfire or tapioca.
Daniel Handler
A passport, as I'm sure you know, is a document that one shows to government officials whenever one reaches a border between two countries, so that the official can learn who you are, where you were born, and how you look when photographed unflatteringly.
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Reading is one form of escape. Running for your life is another.
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One can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways.
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Taking one’s chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling comfortable and warm, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck.
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One of the world's most tiresome questions is what object one would bring to a desert island,because people always answer a deck of cards or Anna Karenina when the obvious answer is a well equipped boat and a crew to sail me off the island and back home where I can play all the card games and read all the Russian novels I want.
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Frustration is an interesting emotional state, because it tends to bring out the worst in whoever is frustrated.
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Just because something is typed-whether it is typed on a business card or typed in a newspaper or book-this does not mean that it is true.
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There is no way of knowing for sure whether or not you can trust someone, for the simple reason that circumstances change all of the time.
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Perhaps if we saw what was ahead of us, and glimpsed the follies, and misfortunes that would befall us later on, we would all stay in our mother's wombs, and then there would be nobody in the world but a great number of very fat, very irritated women.
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Adverbs is a book about love, and I thought that was pretty cheerful, but people who are reading it now are telling me that it's actually quite dark.
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Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.
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One has to adopt a sort of Zen calm, in which you know you wrote the best book that you could at the time.
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So she loved him. She just did immediately and again often and clearly naturally and soundly and obviously and many others.
Daniel Handler
