Quote

Dead women tell no tales. Sad men write them down.

Daniel Handler

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Write
Tell
Women
Writing
Men
Tales
Dead

More quotes by Daniel Handler

Image
It was darker than a pitch-black panther, covered in tar, eating black licorice at the very bottom of the deepest part of the Black Sea.
Daniel Handler
Image
I’m happier than a pig eating bacon!
Daniel Handler
Image
There is no way of knowing for sure whether or not you can trust someone, for the simple reason that circumstances change all of the time.
Daniel Handler
Image
But I must admit I miss you terribly. The world is too quiet without you nearby.
Daniel Handler
Image
When you say, History is written by the winners, you like to think about someone who isn't you. You want to think, Oh, that's the juggernaut I'm standing against. But you're probably part of it.
Daniel Handler
Image
I wrote Rick before I was published, and I had no vision of it, really. It was just a story that occurred to me, and that put its little claws in my brain, and I wrote it, and I showed it to a couple people, and they all said, This is ghastly.
Daniel Handler
Image
There are many things in life that become different if you take a long look at them.
Daniel Handler
Image
In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle.
Daniel Handler
Image
When do you learn that the world, like any diner worth its salt, is open twenty-four hours a day?
Daniel Handler
Image
This is my knife. It is very sharp and very eager to hurt you.
Daniel Handler
Image
Dumping you times infinity. Still not enough.
Daniel Handler
Image
With the publishing of The Basic Eight, it was often assumed that I was really immature and callow, and with the publishing of Watch Your Mouth, it was assumed that I was oversexualized, and with Lemony Snicket, it's often assumed that I'm erudite and depressed. But all the voices more or less came naturally to me.
Daniel Handler
Image
I stand entwined in fire on the inextinguishable bonfire of inconceivable love.
Daniel Handler
Image
I like to think that I get better and better as a writer, but it seems pretty easy to me to slip on disguises of various people.
Daniel Handler
Image
Love can smack you like a seagull, and pour all over your feet like junkmail. You can't be ready for such a thing any more than salt water taffy gets you ready for the ocean.
Daniel Handler
Image
This is love, to sit with someone you've known forever in a place you've been meaning to go, and watching as their life happens to them until you stand up and it's time to go.
Daniel Handler
Image
Life isn't fair, he said, in his undisguised voice, and for once the Baudelaire orphans agreed with every word the man said.
Daniel Handler
Image
There are some secrets you want to keep to yourself, even if they don't matter. They might only matter if you keep them secret.
Daniel Handler
Image
There are two good reasons to put your napkin in your lap. One is that food might spill in your lap, and it is better to stain the napkin than your clothing. The other is that it can serve as a perfect hiding place. Practically nobody is nosey enough to take the napkin off a lap to see what is hidden there.
Daniel Handler
Image
Put your hair up, Min. The secret ingredient is not your hair.
Daniel Handler