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For some stories, it's easy. The moral of 'The Three Bears,' for instance, is Never break into someone else's house.' The moral of 'Snow White' is 'Never eat apples.' The moral of World War I is 'Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand.
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
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Moral
Never
White
Ferdinand
World
War
Assassinate
Easy
Apples
House
Snow
Three
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Bears
Someone
Break
More quotes by Daniel Handler
Dead women tell no tales. Sad men write them down.
Daniel Handler
The book was long, and difficult to read, and Klaus became more and more tired as the night wore on. Occasionally his eyes would close. He found himself reading the same sentence over and over. He found himself reading the same sentence over and over. He found himself reading the same sentence over and over.
Daniel Handler
It is always sad when someone leaves home, unless they are simply going around the corner and will return in a few minutes with ice-cream sandwiches.
Daniel Handler
Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
Daniel Handler
Announcing your death should be like announcing that you are a lunar moth: It must be done quietly or it will not be believed.
Daniel Handler
People don't always get what they deserve in this world.
Daniel Handler
This is love, to sit with someone you've known forever in a place you've been meaning to go, and watching as their life happens to them until you stand up and it's time to go.
Daniel Handler
It is useless for me to describe to you how terrible Violet, Klaus, and even Sunny felt in the time that followed. If you have ever lost someone very important to you, then you already know how it feels, and if you haven't, you cannot possibly imagine it.
Daniel Handler
Members of your family might say they are working hard all day long, while you are off at school or clarinet lessons, but the only way to know this for sure is to follow them at a discreet distance.
Daniel Handler
Your initial opinion on just about anything may change over time.
Daniel Handler
The whole thing of what I’ve been trying,” you said, “is that you’re different, and you keep asking about the other girls, but what I mean is that I don’t think about them, because of the way you are.
Daniel Handler
People worry more about girls, for a good reason: I don't think my parents thought I was going to be raped by a classmate or attacked when I was walking alone in some neighborhood. So it's not just paranoid parents.
Daniel Handler
For Beatrice- My love for you shall live forever. You, however, did not.
Daniel Handler
I go to bed early and rise late and feel as if I have hardly slept, probably because I have been reading almost the entire time.
Daniel Handler
Nobody wants to hear that you will try your best. It is the wrong thing to say. It is like saying 'I probably won't hit you with a shovel.' Suddenly everyone is afraid you will do the opposite.
Daniel Handler
This feeling is not unlike the sinking in one's stomach when one is in an elevator that suddenly goes down, or when you are snug in your bed and your closet door suddenly creaks open to reveal the person who has been hiding there.
Daniel Handler
It was a curious feeling, that something could be so close and so distant at the same time.
Daniel Handler
I'm not very good at the accordion. If I played guitar, I wouldn't be on anyone's album. But because I play the accordion and no one else does, I end up doing strange things.
Daniel Handler
Frustration is an interesting emotional state, because it tends to bring out the worst in whoever is frustrated.
Daniel Handler
They were almond cookies, although they could have been made of spinach and shoes for all I cared. I ate eleven of them, right in a row. It is rude to take the last cookie.
Daniel Handler
