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This toast feels raw. Is it safe to eat raw toast?
Daniel Handler
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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Toasts
Safe
Feels
Toast
More quotes by Daniel Handler
Every new promise was like something heavy I had to carry, with no place to put anything down.
Daniel Handler
Take back the smile and the night, take it all back, I wish I could.
Daniel Handler
I first told the idea to an editor I had met who, after reading one of my novels for adults that was set in a high school, had an idea that I might write something for children.
Daniel Handler
I hadn't even been looking, not for you, and now you were my heart's desire.
Daniel Handler
I was so grateful that Lemony Snicket wasn't the worst movie ever made that I overlooked many things that might have otherwise upset me.
Daniel Handler
One of the world's most tiresome questions is what object one would bring to a desert island,because people always answer a deck of cards or Anna Karenina when the obvious answer is a well equipped boat and a crew to sail me off the island and back home where I can play all the card games and read all the Russian novels I want.
Daniel Handler
I like writing for movies. It's nice to be alone working on fiction in your room, and then it's nice to be in a room with a bunch of people working on a movie.
Daniel Handler
Appearance matters a great deal because you can often tell a lot about people by looking at how they present themselves.
Daniel Handler
I stayed there loving you, though the love made me, not sad but I guess melancholy, for a reason I couldn’t point to.
Daniel Handler
One can remain alive long past the usual date of disintegration if one is unafraid of change, insatiable in intellectual curiosity, interested in big things, and happy in small ways.
Daniel Handler
If everyone fought fire with fire, the whole world would go up in smoke.
Daniel Handler
The right hand doesn’t know what the left is doing” is a phrase that refers to times when people ought to know, but don’t know, about something that is happening very close to them. For instance, you ought to know about the man who watches you when you sleep.
Daniel Handler
Everyone tells you it's all right to cry, but not enough people say it's all right if you don't want people to know.
Daniel Handler
There are two types of panicking: standing still and not saying a word, and leaping all over the place babbling anything that comes into your head.
Daniel Handler
One wanders through life as if wandering through a field in the dark of night, wearing a blindfold and very heavy shoes, with a poisonous toad waiting patiently beneath a clump of weeds, knowing full well that eventually you will step on him.
Daniel Handler
I think I’ve always believed that there is one person in the universe who you’re truly meant for–for whom you are truly meant–and the fact that sometimes there are two or even more people on the earth you can fall in love with really bothers me. It suggests that if you work hard you can be meant for anyone.
Daniel Handler
If you don’t care about something, one way to demonstrate your feelings is to say the word and then repeat the word with the letters S-C-H-M replacing the first letters. Somebody who didn’t care about dentists, for instance could say ‘Dentist, schmentists.
Daniel Handler
As I am sure you know, when people say 'It's my pleasure,' they usually mean something along the lines of, 'There's nothing on Earth I would rather do less.' [...]
Daniel Handler
Sooner or later, everyone's story has an unfortunate event or two...The solution, of course, is to stay as far away from the world as possible and lead a safe, simple life.
Daniel Handler
It is always sad when someone leaves home, unless they are simply going around the corner and will return in a few minutes with ice-cream sandwiches.
Daniel Handler
