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I have a dream of what would have happened if what happened instead hadn't.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Hadn
Instead
Happened
Dream
Would

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The rinsed foam swirled into one drain that always clogged come October when the maples dropped Canadian propaganda over everything.
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Adverbs is a book about love, and I thought that was pretty cheerful, but people who are reading it now are telling me that it's actually quite dark.
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Just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
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For Beatrice, when we met, my life began. Soon afterwards, yours ended.
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The trick to following someone without getting caught is to follow somebody who doesn't think they're being followed.
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The way that the stories go in the Snicket books is just the way stories naturally go to me. They're full of misery, and yet the misery ends up being slightly hilarious. And in terms of the warnings on the back of the books, that really started as an honest assessment of their marketability.
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Sometimes words are not enough.
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and what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may in fact be the first steps of a journey.
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So she loved him. She just did immediately and again often and clearly naturally and soundly and obviously and many others.
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Well-read people are less likely to be evil.
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It is always tedious when someone tells you that if you don't stop crying, they will give you something to cry about, because if you are crying then you already have something to cry about, and so there is no reason for them to give you anything additional to cry about, thank you very much.
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This is like a cookie, it tastes like a cookie having sex with a doughnut.
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The sad truth is the truth is sad.
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I stand entwined in fire on the inextinguishable bonfire of inconceivable love.
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This story is about the Baudelaires. And they are the sort of people who know that there’s always something. Something to invent, something to read, something to bite, and something to do, to make a sanctuary, no matter how small. And for this reason, I am happy to say, the Baudelaires were very fortunate indeed.
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When you need a haircut, it looks like you have no one to take care of you.
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I think if I were walking someplace and I saw a corpse my brain would tell me it was a million things before I believed it was a corpse.
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Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.
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It looked exhausting and pointless, two things that should be avoided at all costs
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I started making plans, thinking we would get that far.
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