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Never trust anyone who has not brought a book with them.

Daniel Handler

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Daniel Handler
Age: 54
Born: 1970
Born: February 28
Accordionist
Author
Musician
Novelist
Screenwriter
Songwriter
Writer
San Francisco County
California
Lemony Snicket
Educational
Brought
Trust
Anyone
Reading
Book
Never

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The sea is nothing but a library of all the tears in history.
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The way sadness works is one of the strangest riddles of the world.
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Opera was an enormous part of my childhood. My parents were both opera buffs, and they met in the box seat of an opera performance. And I also was a boy soprano, so before puberty hit, I was onstage playing a wide variety of orphans and urchins in all sorts of operas, and the sheer melodrama of their stories was just always appealing to me.
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If you are interested in happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book. In this book, not only is there no happy ending, there is no happy beginning and very few happy things in the middle. This is because not very many happy things happened in the lives of the three Baudelaire youngsters.
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Complimenting someone in an exaggerated way is known as flattery, and flattery will generally get you anything you want.
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I’m happier than a pig eating bacon!
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I stayed there loving you, though the love made me, not sad but I guess melancholy, for a reason I couldn’t point to.
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Mostly, it's flattering to meet fans. As long as it's in a planned, professional meeting, rather than, say, someone dropping by my home, which is not as pleasant.
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Love can smack you like a seagull, and pour all over your feet like junkmail. You can't be ready for such a thing any more than salt water taffy gets you ready for the ocean.
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It is easy to decide on what is wrong to wear to a party, such as deep-sea diving equipment or a pair of large pillows, but deciding what is right is much trickier.
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Hal is on his way. The nurse announced reentering the room.
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If you wish to avoid an unpleasant story you had best put this book down
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They didn't understand it, but like so many unfortunate events in life, just because you don't understand it doesn't mean it isn't so.
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The trick to following someone without getting caught is to follow somebody who doesn't think they're being followed.
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Instead of the word 'love' there was an enormous heart, a symbol sometimes used by people who have trouble figuring out the difference between words and shapes.
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If you are allergic to a thing, it is best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if the thing is cats.
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Adverbs is a book about love, and I thought that was pretty cheerful, but people who are reading it now are telling me that it's actually quite dark.
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Someone can break your heart, leave you dead on the lawn, and still you never learn what to say to stop it all over again.
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-Most people would say that she's beautiful. -That's because she's been with most people.
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For Beatrice, when we met, my life began. Soon afterwards, yours ended.
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