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What seems to set apart those at the very top of competitive pursuits from others of roughly equal ability is the degree to which, beginning early in life, they can pursue an arduous practice routine for years and years.

Daniel Goleman

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Daniel Goleman
Age: 78
Born: 1946
Born: March 7
Author
Journalist
Psychologist
Researcher
Writer
Chinatown
Stockton
Beginning
Competitive
Equal
Routine
Practice
Pursue
Ability
Pursuit
Others
Apart
Seems
Degree
Arduous
Years
Degrees
Pursuits
Life
Early
Roughly

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When I went on to write my next book, Working With Emotional Intelligence, I wanted to make a business case that the best performers were those people strong in these skills.
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Although traditional incentives such as bonuses or recognition can prod people to better performance, no external motivators can get people to perform at their absolute best. . . .Wherever people gravitate within their work roles, indicates where their real pleasure lies—and that pleasure is itself motivating.
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The other thing is that if you rely solely on medication to manage depression or anxiety, for example, you have done nothing to train the mind, so that when you come off the medication, you are just as vulnerable to a relapse as though you had never taken the medication.
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Overloading attention shrinks mental control. Life immersed in digital distractions creates a near constant cognitive overload. And that overload wears out self-control.
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Fear, in evolution, has a special prominence: perhaps more than any other emotion it is crucial for survival.
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People who are optimistic see a failure as due to something that can be changed so that they can succeed next time around, while pessimists take the blame for the failure, ascribing it to some characteristic they are helpless to change.
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One way to boost our will power and focus is to manage our distractions instead of letting them manage us.
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Even though a high IQ is no guarantee of prosperity, prestige, or happiness in life, our schools and our culture fixate on academic abilities, ignoring the emotional intelligence that also matters immensely for our personal destiny.
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Scheduling down time as part of your routine is hard but worth it, personally, even professionally.
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Threats to our standing in the eyes of others are remarkably potent biologically, almost as powerful as those to our very survival.
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When the darkness is seen as a necessary prelude to the creative light, one is less likely to ascribe frustration to personal inadequacy or label it as bad.
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Like secondhand smoke, the leakage of emotions can make a bystander an innocent casualty of someone else's toxic state.
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Remember, empathy need not lead to sympathetically giving in to the other side’s demands—knowing how someone feels does not mean agreeing with them.
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What really matters for success, character, happiness and life long achievements is a definite set of emotional skills - your EQ - not just purely cognitive abilities that are measured by conventional IQ tests.
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IQ and technical skills are important, but emotional intelligence is the sine qua non of leadership.
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When I say manage emotions, I only mean the really distressing, incapacitating emotions. Feeling emotions is what makes life rich. You need your passions.
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I think the smartest thing for people to do to manage very distressing emotions is to take a medication if it helps, but don't do only that. You also need to train your mind.
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Empathy represents the foundation skill for all the social competencies important for work.
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A prerequisite to empathy is simply paying attention to the person in pain.
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Every morning, I go off to a small studio behind my house to write. I try to ignore all email and phone calls until lunchtime. Then I launch into the sometimes frantic busy-ness of a tightly scheduled day.
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