Quote

They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Nice
Jesus
School
Used
Sunday
Littles
Thank
Little
Beat
Beats
Yeah

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People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
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Even when I go to a salad bar, I need to feel like I'm one of the first people there.
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I won't take no for a question.
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I can smell bullshit from a mile away but it's so much harder to detect when it's around you all day.
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
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You have to have a strong sense of humor to date me, and also know that you're probably going to be a part of the routine quite a bit.
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If you have to be at work at 8, it's always like, 7:54. Just enough time to do nothing. To just lay there and go, I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
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I always wanted to be a snake. Every time I saw a snake on TV. I'd always say 'Why not me?'
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I was being chased by a giant crab. That's not funny.
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I love singing along to the radio while I'm riding in the back of a squad car.
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When you swear to God, its true ... right now God is watching and saying, this is true.
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When you see somebody walking down the street wearing a Superman t-shirt, you just want to shoot them in the chest ... when they start to bleed go, I guess not
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I was not a silly kid or outgoing. In fact, I suffered from quite a bit of anxiety. I used to have panic attacks when I was a teenager, really incapacitating moments, because I had some phobias.
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I'm not racist, I've got a black president.
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I miss dating only for that final moment you kiss goodnight, watch her get out of your car and run into the police station.
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