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I won't take no for a question.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Question
Take

More quotes by Dane Cook

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Jim Norton and Harland Williams always make me laugh.
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Here's how you know that you're really drunk: when you get into a taxi cab and you think the fare is the time.
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My mom and dad passed away from cancer. Within nine months, I lost both of my folks. Immediately after that, I had a horrible betrayal where my brother, who worked for me, stole a lot of my money. He's in jail now.
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Drive, ego and cocksureness are all essential elements in terms of getting exactly what you want but losing everything you've got.
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I get so into the moment.
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Any guy that refers to dating women as the hunt or being on the prowl should be evaluated for a number of conditions.
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It's amazing how dumb people can impress you with how much stupider they can be when they really assert themselves.
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You need to open up your soul and have a weep-a-thon.
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When you get hit by a car sometimes your shoes will fly off, sometimes your pants will come off, but I was not fortunate enough to see the pants portion.
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There was a girl I loved in high school - but never spoke to. Cut to my five-year reunion: I'm an entirely different person.
Dane Cook
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I'm a late-night guy.
Dane Cook
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Ex-girlfriends will find themselves in my new routine. Sometimes they like that, and sometimes they definitely do not. But comedians should come with a giant warning or disclaimer: IF YOU DATE ME, IT WILL BE IN MY ACT.
Dane Cook
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There's estrogen running through my veins!
Dane Cook
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When somebody says I wouldn't change a thing they're thinking of something they would change.
Dane Cook
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I just get excited doing shows. Off stage I am actually very feeble and must be spoon-fed because my hands are too brittle.
Dane Cook
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When someone's running late through an airport, I hope they miss their flight so they can meet the love of their life at the duty free shop.
Dane Cook
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I have new ideas every day, and I always want to take on new challenges.
Dane Cook
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If you have to be at work at 8, it's always like, 7:54. Just enough time to do nothing. To just lay there and go, I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
Dane Cook
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When you don't have love, it's like there's a party going on, and everybody was invited, except for you. And you just happened to be walking by that house in the rain...
Dane Cook
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Let's talk a little about love. Sometimes you meet somebody and you have what is known as a relationship and things can go great. If things go great you have a great relationship. Sometimes it doesn't go so great and I call that a relationshit!
Dane Cook