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It's amazing how dumb people can impress you with how much stupider they can be when they really assert themselves.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Impress
Dumb
Amazing
Much
Really
People
Stupider
Assert

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I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people.
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I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
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There's estrogen running through my veins!
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
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I was very good at kickball ... I was wonderful at ah doing that kick and your leg goes up and your shoe went on top of the school
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Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.
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When you're on a movie set and you are hopefully making a comedy, everyone's stifling their laughter. You're looking at the crew guys, hoping someone is making that face like, and not like, this is not working out, man.
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I feel like I was born and bred to stay self-motivated. I'm not one of those people who ho-hums and feels sorry for himself when something's bad.
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If you have to be at work at 8, it's always like, 7:54. Just enough time to do nothing. To just lay there and go, I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
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If you think your demeanor is mellow or not particularly charismatic, the material can life you higher. So write everyday, and get onstage or in a coffee shop where they are doing open mice, anywhere you can perform even if that means starting your own open mic night - and be your own self.
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I would love to have acidy spit.
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If my voice can resonate that way with kids, maybe it will resonate through 'Planes' as well, and they'll hear that little something that I'm giving to them, a performance that says to them, I want to try. It's all interconnected. I don't think it's thinking too deeply about it.
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People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
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I always thought that if I got no love at all early in my standup career, or I was god awful, I thought I'd get into psychology.
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My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.
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I could take my time, and nobody was pressuring me to be a headliner. I could go up there, find my voice, and figure out what I wanted to do.
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When you swear to God, its true ... right now God is watching and saying, this is true.
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I always wanted to be a snake. Every time I saw a snake on TV. I'd always say 'Why not me?'
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You have to have a strong sense of humor to date me, and also know that you're probably going to be a part of the routine quite a bit.
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I'm curious by individuals that embrace half a story so they can justify how incomplete they feel about their own self worth.
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