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I'm a deep thinker when it comes to shallow no brainers.
Dane Cook
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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Shallow
Thinker
Deep
Comes
More quotes by Dane Cook
If you take a negative, turn it inside out, it's still a negative. You're just revealing the ugly inside of negative so I say keep it as is.
Dane Cook
Sometimes, when you want to make a difference in a person's life, stay out of it.
Dane Cook
I could take my time, and nobody was pressuring me to be a headliner. I could go up there, find my voice, and figure out what I wanted to do.
Dane Cook
Ex-girlfriends will find themselves in my new routine. Sometimes they like that, and sometimes they definitely do not. But comedians should come with a giant warning or disclaimer: IF YOU DATE ME, IT WILL BE IN MY ACT.
Dane Cook
Valentine's Day is a time to celebrate the joy of being in love. Unless you're single & lonely then it's called Laundry Day.
Dane Cook
I think beating someone to death with a ukulele would just sound funny.
Dane Cook
Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.
Dane Cook
You can easily tell if a person is lying and cheating on you if they say, I love you. I would never lie to you or cheat on you.
Dane Cook
I have new ideas every day, and I always want to take on new challenges.
Dane Cook
I've lived (in LA) for so long, I don't even know what is real and what isn't anymore.
Dane Cook
It's hard dealing with day to day disappointments and feeling like you can't find success. Especially when your best friend is Pixar.
Dane Cook
We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful shits.
Dane Cook
I was very good at kickball ... I was wonderful at ah doing that kick and your leg goes up and your shoe went on top of the school
Dane Cook
There's estrogen running through my veins!
Dane Cook
You are the director of your own life story. Don't cast idiots or people will walk out during your 2nd act.
Dane Cook
Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.
Dane Cook
Vince Vaughn is a genuine person, awesome guy. He'll come to a lot of my shows. It's not that often that you can meet someone as cool as Vince.
Dane Cook
I'm always going to be someone that people enjoy watching.
Dane Cook
When someone's running late through an airport, I hope they miss their flight so they can meet the love of their life at the duty free shop.
Dane Cook
I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.
Dane Cook