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You can't become tempted if you just give in a little quicker.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Little
Giving
Quicker
Tempted
Become
Give
Littles

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I'm a deep thinker when it comes to shallow no brainers.
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When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.
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A lot of comics are kind of vampire types we do our shows and disappear into the night. My philosophy was, this is like politics, and if I want people to know about my campaign, I'm going to go out there and shake hands.
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I miss dating only for that final moment you kiss goodnight, watch her get out of your car and run into the police station.
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Dear semi hot girl taking photos on a boat. It's not your boat so stop acting like you own it. You drive a used Civic.
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Sometimes, when a person gains a lot of success at a very young age, they become targets, and it's really easy to follow the crowds and not make independent decisions based on truly how you feel.
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I say God bless you... I don't say bless you... I'm not the Lord. I can't do that...
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I am going to name a group of my kids after my favorite cartoons, I am going to name them after Transformers.
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You know your gut instincts are spot on about a person when you can also detect a water source in the soil beneath them.
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On stage I am the actor, director and the bouncer all at the same time. Fear does not exist in this dojo does it? No Sensi! Sorry when I get excited I have to toss in some Karate Kid quotes.
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Three weeks ago one of my dreams came true. I finally got to see something I always wanted to witness live. I finally saw someone get hit by a car... Nailed!
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If you think your demeanor is mellow or not particularly charismatic, the material can life you higher. So write everyday, and get onstage or in a coffee shop where they are doing open mice, anywhere you can perform even if that means starting your own open mic night - and be your own self.
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I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
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I was being chased by a giant crab. That's not funny.
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When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.
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You can easily tell if a person is lying and cheating on you if they say, I love you. I would never lie to you or cheat on you.
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If you're drunk please don't drive. If you're on shrooms please don't think Walmart's a prison for bad clothing that needs help escaping.
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Hi, I'm a buck tooth and I like to be outside past the lips.
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