Quote

Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Jokes
Hell
Hurt
Face
Punched
Faces
Punching
Every
Origin
Like
Hurts
People
Joke

More quotes by Dane Cook

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I have faith in all mankind. Well,not faith really, more like hopeful suspicion. And not all but 5 people. Mankind meaning computers.
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I was being chased by a giant crab. That's not funny.
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When I'm wrong I'm like the Emperor on the Death Star thinking he'll turn Luke. Yet, when I'm right I'm a Jedi like my father before me.
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Let's talk a little about love. Sometimes you meet somebody and you have what is known as a relationship and things can go great. If things go great you have a great relationship. Sometimes it doesn't go so great and I call that a relationshit!
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You can't become tempted if you just give in a little quicker.
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When you're not in love, when you don't have love, everybody you know falls in love.
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People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
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I won't take no for a question.
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I have never even had a sip of alcohol, never have done drugs. The hardest thing I have ever done would be Pepsi.
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Jim Norton and Harland Williams always make me laugh.
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Hi, I'm a buck tooth and I like to be outside past the lips.
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Three weeks ago one of my dreams came true. I finally got to see something I always wanted to witness live. I finally saw someone get hit by a car... Nailed!
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There's estrogen running through my veins!
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I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.
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It's not for any purpose such as religion, health, or things like that, I just never felt I had the need or want to drink or do drugs.
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I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.
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When you swear to God, its true ... right now God is watching and saying, this is true.
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You can easily tell if a person is lying and cheating on you if they say, I love you. I would never lie to you or cheat on you.
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Even when I go to a salad bar, I need to feel like I'm one of the first people there.
Dane Cook
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Valentine's Day is a time to celebrate the joy of being in love. Unless you're single & lonely then it's called Laundry Day.
Dane Cook