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Sometimes sex is just a way to escape having to talk to that person.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Escape
Sex
Talk
Persons
Person
Sometimes
Way

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I don't know if I could rebuild an airplane engine, but I know a little bit about rotors and rivets.
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If you're drunk please don't drive. If you're on shrooms please don't think Walmart's a prison for bad clothing that needs help escaping.
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I was doing comedy in laundry mats in 1992, literally where I would bring a little gorilla amp and a lapel mike and just start performing.
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My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.
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I'm bringing back the skinny tie but wearing it tied around my balls.
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You can't teach an old hater new truths.
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You have to have a strong sense of humor to date me, and also know that you're probably going to be a part of the routine quite a bit.
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We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful shits.
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I'm focused on staying as healthy as I can so I can work more.
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If you take a negative, turn it inside out, it's still a negative. You're just revealing the ugly inside of negative so I say keep it as is.
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I'm not racist, I've got a black president.
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They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus.
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When you see somebody walking down the street wearing a Superman t-shirt, you just want to shoot them in the chest ... when they start to bleed go, I guess not
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I have a new saying, what I see in Vegas, I am telling everybody.
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I was not a silly kid or outgoing. In fact, I suffered from quite a bit of anxiety. I used to have panic attacks when I was a teenager, really incapacitating moments, because I had some phobias.
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I love singing along to the radio while I'm riding in the back of a squad car.
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When you swear to God, its true ... right now God is watching and saying, this is true.
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I was very good at kickball ... I was wonderful at ah doing that kick and your leg goes up and your shoe went on top of the school
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When you don't have love, it's like there's a party going on, and everybody was invited, except for you. And you just happened to be walking by that house in the rain...
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I don't get any anxiety. I don't because of two reasons. Number one, just breaking through it as a kid and finally getting past it was like okay, nothing's ever going to feel that scary again as that deafening silence of a joke not working. Any joke not working is not as bad as not being able to even try and get on stage.
Dane Cook