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I'm not giving up on life. I'm giving up on today.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Today
Giving
Life

More quotes by Dane Cook

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I've been ignoring my feelings lately. That works pretty well. Might also settle for less this week, just to try it out.
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I'm not racist, I've got a black president.
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I just get excited doing shows. Off stage I am actually very feeble and must be spoon-fed because my hands are too brittle.
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When I first hit the scene, it was just a lot of go, go, go, go, go. I have a lot of natural energy anyway, but it was over the top.
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I have a new saying, what I see in Vegas, I am telling everybody.
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You can easily tell if a person is lying and cheating on you if they say, I love you. I would never lie to you or cheat on you.
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You need to open up your soul and have a weep-a-thon.
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I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
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We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful shits.
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Text a guy you like right now, I'm thinking about you. If he says, mmm are you in bed? Never speak to him again he's a lifelong moron.
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I get so into the moment.
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The whole thing with comedy is that you are always in control. Writer, director, actor, producer, and sometimes bouncer. And you are just a piece of their puzzle.
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
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Nice teeth is a turn on for me. If you open your mouth and it looks like a battle of epic proportions, I don't like it.
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I was home educated but would skip my lessons to go hang out at school.
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I feel like I was born and bred to stay self-motivated. I'm not one of those people who ho-hums and feels sorry for himself when something's bad.
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When somebody says I wouldn't change a thing they're thinking of something they would change.
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You know your gut instincts are spot on about a person when you can also detect a water source in the soil beneath them.
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I won't take no for a question.
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I always wanted to be a snake. Every time I saw a snake on TV. I'd always say 'Why not me?'
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