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I have new ideas every day, and I always want to take on new challenges.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Take
Every
Always
Challenges
Ideas

More quotes by Dane Cook

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People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
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You need to open up your soul and have a weep-a-thon.
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When someone's running late through an airport, I hope they miss their flight so they can meet the love of their life at the duty free shop.
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I'm always going to be someone that people enjoy watching.
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You have to realize, when you're a comedian, that you have to have a thick skin. And trust me, being onstage in front of people is already difficult enough. Somebody's personal attack in an email is not as hard as getting onstage.
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There's estrogen running through my veins!
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If you're drunk please don't drive. If you're on shrooms please don't think Walmart's a prison for bad clothing that needs help escaping.
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I am going to name a group of my kids after my favorite cartoons, I am going to name them after Transformers.
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Nice teeth is a turn on for me. If you open your mouth and it looks like a battle of epic proportions, I don't like it.
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I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people.
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You are the director of your own life story. Don't cast idiots or people will walk out during your 2nd act.
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Let's talk a little about love. Sometimes you meet somebody and you have what is known as a relationship and things can go great. If things go great you have a great relationship. Sometimes it doesn't go so great and I call that a relationshit!
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Nothing is a better icebreaker than a great joke.
Dane Cook
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I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.
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Ex-girlfriends will find themselves in my new routine. Sometimes they like that, and sometimes they definitely do not. But comedians should come with a giant warning or disclaimer: IF YOU DATE ME, IT WILL BE IN MY ACT.
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They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus.
Dane Cook
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I'm bringing back the skinny tie but wearing it tied around my balls.
Dane Cook
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A couple of days back, I got into a car accident. Not my fault. Even if it's not your fault, the other person gets out of their car and looks at you like it's your fault: Why did you stop at a red light and let me hit you doing 80!
Dane Cook
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It's an incredible feeling falling in love someone who doesn't know you exist.
Dane Cook
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Sometimes, when you want to make a difference in a person's life, stay out of it.
Dane Cook