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I say God bless you... I don't say bless you... I'm not the Lord. I can't do that...

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Bless
Lord

More quotes by Dane Cook

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I don't have to do anything for anyone else's benefit anymore. I just want to exceed my own expectations.
Dane Cook
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If my voice can resonate that way with kids, maybe it will resonate through 'Planes' as well, and they'll hear that little something that I'm giving to them, a performance that says to them, I want to try. It's all interconnected. I don't think it's thinking too deeply about it.
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I have never even had a sip of alcohol, never have done drugs. The hardest thing I have ever done would be Pepsi.
Dane Cook
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You can easily tell if a person is lying and cheating on you if they say, I love you. I would never lie to you or cheat on you.
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I miss dating only for that final moment you kiss goodnight, watch her get out of your car and run into the police station.
Dane Cook
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There was a girl I loved in high school - but never spoke to. Cut to my five-year reunion: I'm an entirely different person.
Dane Cook
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When you're not in love, when you don't have love, everybody you know falls in love.
Dane Cook
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
Dane Cook
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I think beating someone to death with a ukulele would just sound funny.
Dane Cook
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I was doing comedy in laundry mats in 1992, literally where I would bring a little gorilla amp and a lapel mike and just start performing.
Dane Cook
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You can't become tempted if you just give in a little quicker.
Dane Cook
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I have new ideas every day, and I always want to take on new challenges.
Dane Cook
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We're all gonna lie, we're all gonna cry, and we're all gonna take painful shits.
Dane Cook
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I think that people who do enjoy my stand-up comedy and the people who get it and the people who are taken in by it, they see that I'm a guy that has love of the game.
Dane Cook
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When you're on a movie set and you are hopefully making a comedy, everyone's stifling their laughter. You're looking at the crew guys, hoping someone is making that face like, and not like, this is not working out, man.
Dane Cook
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Strip clubs are great places to meet interesting people you only wanna know for about 40 minutes.
Dane Cook
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On stage I am the actor, director and the bouncer all at the same time. Fear does not exist in this dojo does it? No Sensi! Sorry when I get excited I have to toss in some Karate Kid quotes.
Dane Cook
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Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.
Dane Cook
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Then it was snack time, right in the middle of mass. Right out of nowhere, the priest would look down and say, 'Let's have some yum yums!' You would get in line - you would jump in the line - and you would go up and get the crouton O'Christ.
Dane Cook
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Vince Vaughn is a genuine person, awesome guy. He'll come to a lot of my shows. It's not that often that you can meet someone as cool as Vince.
Dane Cook