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When you are doing stand-up comedy, you are the writer, producer, director, sometimes bouncer.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Producers
Director
Directors
Writer
Comedy
Stand
Sometimes
Bouncer
Producer

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A lot of comics are kind of vampire types we do our shows and disappear into the night. My philosophy was, this is like politics, and if I want people to know about my campaign, I'm going to go out there and shake hands.
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My mom and dad passed away from cancer. Within nine months, I lost both of my folks. Immediately after that, I had a horrible betrayal where my brother, who worked for me, stole a lot of my money. He's in jail now.
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My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.
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Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.
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Pain only hurts when you are looking for a reason to quit. You don't feel a thing when you know you can still win.
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When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.
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I say it with my tongue firmly planted in cheek but there's truth to it - being a comedian is very close to being a therapist. When you're working smaller clubs, you're listening. You're feeling an energy, you're going with a tone but when people start yelling out, you almost start a conversation with people.
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I live my life like there's no yesterday.
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
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Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.
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That MySpace is the story of the year. Everyone but my mother is on it.
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I was being chased by a giant crab. That's not funny.
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There was a girl I loved in high school - but never spoke to. Cut to my five-year reunion: I'm an entirely different person.
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I was doing comedy in laundry mats in 1992, literally where I would bring a little gorilla amp and a lapel mike and just start performing.
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I'm always going to be someone that people enjoy watching.
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I don't laugh out loud at comics a lot.
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You can't teach an old hater new truths.
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I could take my time, and nobody was pressuring me to be a headliner. I could go up there, find my voice, and figure out what I wanted to do.
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I love singing along to the radio while I'm riding in the back of a squad car.
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People know I have a good time on stage. I love my life. I love my job.
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