Quote

I've lived (in LA) for so long, I don't even know what is real and what isn't anymore.

Dane Cook

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Even
Long
Anymore
Lived
Comedy
Real

More quotes by Dane Cook

Image
A couple of days back, I got into a car accident. Not my fault. Even if it's not your fault, the other person gets out of their car and looks at you like it's your fault: Why did you stop at a red light and let me hit you doing 80!
Dane Cook
Image
Then it was snack time, right in the middle of mass. Right out of nowhere, the priest would look down and say, 'Let's have some yum yums!' You would get in line - you would jump in the line - and you would go up and get the crouton O'Christ.
Dane Cook
Image
Strip clubs are great places to meet interesting people you only wanna know for about 40 minutes.
Dane Cook
Image
I can do more than just stand-up comedy, and the only way I'll be able to show that is if I do it myself. Because nobody trusts that I can do it.
Dane Cook
Image
You know your girls up to no good when her and her friends make a pact to post nothing on Instagram.
Dane Cook
Image
I was not a silly kid or outgoing. In fact, I suffered from quite a bit of anxiety. I used to have panic attacks when I was a teenager, really incapacitating moments, because I had some phobias.
Dane Cook
Image
I have a new saying, what I see in Vegas, I am telling everybody.
Dane Cook
Image
You can't teach an old hater new truths.
Dane Cook
Image
If you have to be at work at 8, it's always like, 7:54. Just enough time to do nothing. To just lay there and go, I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
Dane Cook
Image
I get so into the moment.
Dane Cook
Image
If my voice can resonate that way with kids, maybe it will resonate through 'Planes' as well, and they'll hear that little something that I'm giving to them, a performance that says to them, I want to try. It's all interconnected. I don't think it's thinking too deeply about it.
Dane Cook
Image
Losing my mind sounds so pessimistic. I prefer the term winning my insanity.
Dane Cook
Image
They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus.
Dane Cook
Image
When you get hit by a car sometimes your shoes will fly off, sometimes your pants will come off, but I was not fortunate enough to see the pants portion.
Dane Cook
Image
Listening to Evanescence makes me want to break up with a girl in real time as a giant antique hourglass falls to the floor in slow motion.
Dane Cook
Image
When people refer to 'Back in the Day,' it was a Wednesday. Just a little fun fact for you.
Dane Cook
Image
You are the director of your own life story. Don't cast idiots or people will walk out during your 2nd act.
Dane Cook
Image
Sometimes sex is just a way to escape having to talk to that person.
Dane Cook
Image
Ma'am, are you trying to molest me via drivethru?
Dane Cook
Image
Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.
Dane Cook