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Nothing is a better icebreaker than a great joke.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Joke
Jokes
Better
Nothing
Great

More quotes by Dane Cook

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I was very good at kickball ... I was wonderful at ah doing that kick and your leg goes up and your shoe went on top of the school
Dane Cook
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If you're drunk please don't drive. If you're on shrooms please don't think Walmart's a prison for bad clothing that needs help escaping.
Dane Cook
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I would love to have acidy spit.
Dane Cook
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I don't get any anxiety. I don't because of two reasons. Number one, just breaking through it as a kid and finally getting past it was like okay, nothing's ever going to feel that scary again as that deafening silence of a joke not working. Any joke not working is not as bad as not being able to even try and get on stage.
Dane Cook
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You have to learn the crowd. I just pay attention to them so I can make sure I can make them laugh.
Dane Cook
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You can't become tempted if you just give in a little quicker.
Dane Cook
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If haters or whatever want to find you - I mean, some of them are so tenacious. You want to hire them to work for you. Theyre very, very savvy in terms of how they find you and get to you.
Dane Cook
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I think that people who do enjoy my stand-up comedy and the people who get it and the people who are taken in by it, they see that I'm a guy that has love of the game.
Dane Cook
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There's estrogen running through my veins!
Dane Cook
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When I'm looking for hot button answers to tough questions, I don't look to congressman or my mayor. I say, 'What would Miss U.S.A. have to say about this?'
Dane Cook
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Then it was snack time, right in the middle of mass. Right out of nowhere, the priest would look down and say, 'Let's have some yum yums!' You would get in line - you would jump in the line - and you would go up and get the crouton O'Christ.
Dane Cook
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They used to beat me up after Sunday School, I used to get beat up... yeah, that's a nice little thank you from Jesus.
Dane Cook
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There's always someone in every group of friends that nobody likes.
Dane Cook
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It really drives me banana sangwich.
Dane Cook
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I'm bringing back the skinny tie but wearing it tied around my balls.
Dane Cook
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Video games don't make people go nuts. I played Super Mario forever. Not once hopping on a turtle or smash my head through a brick ceiling.
Dane Cook
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Listening to Evanescence makes me want to break up with a girl in real time as a giant antique hourglass falls to the floor in slow motion.
Dane Cook
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I'm not racist, I've got a black president.
Dane Cook
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My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.
Dane Cook
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Even when I go to a salad bar, I need to feel like I'm one of the first people there.
Dane Cook