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I don't have to do anything for anyone else's benefit anymore. I just want to exceed my own expectations.

Dane Cook

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Dane Cook
Age: 52
Born: 1972
Born: March 18
Comedian
Film Actor
Film Director
Film Producer
Screenwriter
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Boston
Massachusetts
Dane Jeffrey Cook
Exceed
Benefit
Anymore
Expectations
Benefits
Anyone
Else
Anything

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Pain only hurts when you are looking for a reason to quit. You don't feel a thing when you know you can still win.
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I'm quitting the business today. I'm going to open up an appliance store, I've always really been into toasters. I'm giving it all up.
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The whole thing with comedy is that you are always in control. Writer, director, actor, producer, and sometimes bouncer. And you are just a piece of their puzzle.
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I'm bringing back the skinny tie but wearing it tied around my balls.
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If you live far away from a person you no longer want to date just let them know that they are geographically undesirable.
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There were times, earlier in my career, where I didn't have the wherewithal to self-edit, and I probably said things and pushed the limits to places where people might be put off. But that's truly part of developing as an artist.
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When I'm looking for hot button answers to tough questions, I don't look to congressman or my mayor. I say, 'What would Miss U.S.A. have to say about this?'
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Sometimes sex is just a way to escape having to talk to that person.
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Jim Norton and Harland Williams always make me laugh.
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You have to have a strong sense of humor to date me, and also know that you're probably going to be a part of the routine quite a bit.
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Every joke has its origin - the punching people in the face joke. It hurts like hell to get punched in the face.
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My professional dreams were coming true while I was living a personal nightmare.
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I have faith in all mankind. Well,not faith really, more like hopeful suspicion. And not all but 5 people. Mankind meaning computers.
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I get so into the moment.
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We all hope for breakthrough rebirth moments.
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When I first hit the scene, it was just a lot of go, go, go, go, go. I have a lot of natural energy anyway, but it was over the top.
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Drive, ego and cocksureness are all essential elements in terms of getting exactly what you want but losing everything you've got.
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I love hecklers. They remind you that you are a comedian.
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I can't do anything! I can't even have an English muffin!
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