Quote

What if you went to Hell, and it was exactly what you thought it would be: just a cave with fire? And the devil really was this idiot in a red leotard with a pitchfork?

Dana Gould

Change background

T
T
T

Change font

TAGS & TOPICS

Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Went
Pitchforks
Fire
Cave
Thought
Caves
Really
Idiot
Would
Red
Exactly
Devil
Leotards
Hell
Pitchfork

More quotes by Dana Gould

Image
As Global Warming raises temparatures, it takes longer to cool pies on window sills, and I wonder if this whole thing was caused by hobos.
Dana Gould
Image
Now that the Sanctity and Holiness of heterosexual marriage has been destroyed, are they going to cancel The Bachelor?
Dana Gould
Image
Cupcakes - when you want to watch your weight, but still feel the pride that comes with eating an entire cake.
Dana Gould
Image
Had an audition for a pilot today, but realized I could save gas and help the environment by pissing up a rope here at home!
Dana Gould
Image
Anything is possible if you believe in yourself, said the guidance counsellor, stifling a laugh.
Dana Gould
Image
Since the dawn of time, primitive humans thought, loved and had poetry. They also pooped on everything. It was horrible.
Dana Gould
Image
I don't mind being alone when I'm surrounded by people, I just hate being alone when I'm alone.
Dana Gould
Image
Halloween Costume I Hate: kids dressed as their parent's poltical beliefs. Oooh! Aren't you a scary health care reform bill!
Dana Gould
Image
There is no fast, easy shortcut for the word abbreviation.
Dana Gould
Image
Chihuahuas are the perfect pet if you don't have a person in your life who screams and shits their pants every time there's a noise.
Dana Gould
Image
Egg nog. Because nothing satisfies like a cold glass of eggs.
Dana Gould
Image
If pop music reflects the culture, this will surely go down as the era in which people rose up and realized it was fun to dance at parties.
Dana Gould
Image
Love is like pancreatitis it starts off slow, then builds in intensity until you become consumed and develop violent cramps.
Dana Gould
Image
Republicans don't believe government works, and get into it to prove it will fail. Same with strippers and relationships.
Dana Gould
Image
You rarely get a convincing lecture on playing to your strength from a bald guy with a ponytail.
Dana Gould
Image
We would have never gotten mace had someone not thought, There must be a good way to burn someone's eyes.
Dana Gould
Image
If I ever go into a coma, one of you has to promise to come by occasionally and tweeze my unibrow.
Dana Gould
Image
I got mugged about six months ago. The oddest thing about the entire situation, though, was that I wasn't afraid, which is strange because basically I experience my life through two primary emotions: fear and suppressed fear.
Dana Gould
Image
You have an obligation to challenge your fans and your viewers.
Dana Gould
Image
Where is the good will in the thought, I was going to throw this in the garbage, do you want to wear it?
Dana Gould