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Something tells me that Mitt Romney's sex face is the same as his regular face.

Dana Gould

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Dana Gould
Age: 60
Born: 1964
Born: August 24
Actor
Comedian
Screenwriter
Singer
Stand-Up Comedian
Television Actor
Voice Actor
Writer
Hopedale
Massachusetts
Dana John Gould
Dana J. Gould
Something
Mitt
Romney
Regular
Tells
Sex
Face
Faces

More quotes by Dana Gould

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Maybe the next three Star Wars movies will tell the story of how the last three Star Wars movies got so shitty.
Dana Gould
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The best part of chronic head lice is it takes away your fear of dying alone.
Dana Gould
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If you're selling something on Craiglist, it's never a good idea to end the description with, May have lice.
Dana Gould
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Just saw a woman with a big tattoo of Jesus on her back. I guess it's an ixnay on the oggy style-day.
Dana Gould
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Dogs - putting the lie to the age-old saying, I could never love anyone who ate a diaper.
Dana Gould
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If I ever go into a coma, one of you has to promise to come by occasionally and tweeze my unibrow.
Dana Gould
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I feel sorry for high school teams still named the Cougars. Now what does the coach say? Get out there and play like horny old ladies!
Dana Gould
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Centuries ago, human beings created marriage. Later, they looked to the sky and dreamt of traveling to the moon. Coincidence?
Dana Gould
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Women do it all the time to look younger and it would make perfect sense if one of them ever came out looking younger - but they don't. They just look the same they all get plastic surgery face. No matter who they look like going in, they all come out looking like the girl from the band on 'The Muppet Show.
Dana Gould
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I like my coffee the way I like my women: after waiting impatiently in a long line.
Dana Gould
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Do people in the Ku Klux Klan who die and come back as ghosts have to wear two sheets when attending the rally?
Dana Gould
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My dog is so old, she now has a lot of cats.
Dana Gould
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People get into stand-up comedy by and large because they're smart and they have a perspective.
Dana Gould
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We come into this world naked, covered in our own blood, screaming in terror - and it doesn't have to stop there if you know how to live right
Dana Gould
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Why do old people drive with their mouths open?
Dana Gould
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Getting plastic surgery in your late 70's, it's kind of like painting your house as the fire approaches. Just die, there's no shame in it.
Dana Gould
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To me 30 isn't old. But it's definitely the beginning of no longer young. Because you notice little subtle things happen to you. You'll be in your car driving around listening to the radio and hear stuff like, That's was an oldie from The Clash.
Dana Gould
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How do I ask my shrink to stop responding to everything I say with, Too much information! and then giggling behind a pillow?
Dana Gould
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For men there are costumes like fireman, policeman and vampire. For women there are costumes like slutty fireman, slutty policeman and slutty vampire.
Dana Gould
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I love it when dogs yawn. Especially when it's in the middle of another dog's speech.
Dana Gould